imah c anggun

Sofia-Zack Wedding Saga

2011-12-15T01:28:00.000-08:00

Sorang lagi my younger cousin is married. I think ader sorang lagi yang akan memintas imah early next year. Seronok jer diorang sumer nih dah kawen and nak kawen eh.. hihihi

Here I share the moment of happiness of my dearest cousin.. kawan imah main masak2 waktu kecik2 dulu.. hihihi.. This is my first attempt to sort of doing video clip.. ooops, wedding video clip.

Really happy that they had met their 'jodoh'. May the live hapily ever after...

Adamu.. Hadirmu.. Jantungku

2011-11-22T11:48:00.000-08:00

This is one of my effort to make me believe that I do have a heart... and feelings. I was once capable of loving and being in love...

Dengan lafaz Bismillah
Langkah mula di atur
Dengan kalimat itu
Entah bila... bagaimana
bermula...

Kita tidak sedarah
Darahmu, darahku berbeza
Oksigen memisahkan kita

Namun
laluan kita searah
Terus tidak berpaling
Injapmu membuka keyakinanku,
menutup keraguanku

Tanpamu
tiada lub-dubku
Walau paling kecil
pentingnya dirimu
Kaulah nyawaku

Di sini kita tetap bertemu
Di persimpangan ini
jantungku..

The Meet Cute

2011-11-21T11:07:00.000-08:00

I've always been fascinated with the story of how 2 people meet. Even in movies, I always look forward to the 'Meet Cute' part, a part where the hero will meet the heroin for the first time. I like to know the things like how they come to know each other?.. What are their feelings at the time of first meet?. Do they experience the 'love at the first sight'? or is it just an attraction?

I would say that, my parents had a unique 'Meet Cute' moment. They had known each other a few years before their first meet. My father was studying at MRC at the time. I was told that, it was required by the senior that everyone must have a girl picture stick in their locker . You know back then, ragging can be pretty tough. Mom told me that someone had told her that my father was once badly injured by his seniors. I don't really know what he did that had caused that, but I got the picture of how bad the senior 'bullying' can be at the time. So, I understand, if senior had asked to do 'A', so, by hook or by crook, you have to do 'A'.

My father don't have any girlfriend at the time. But, his best friend has. So, his best friend suggested that, while he'll be asking his girlfriend to post her picture over, he'll ask his girlfriend to send a picture of her friend too, for my father. Just so happen that the girlfriend is mom's best friend. So, as you all can guess.. A pic of mom had also travelled all the way from Kuala Kangsar to Sg. Besi. Yes! My father finally got the girl picture stick in his locker as directed by the senior. Very little that he knows, the girl in the picture will be his future wife. What a fate eh?

I come to know that they become acquainted after that. Due to the distance between them, they only communicated via mails. Obviuosly, no mobile, no e-mail and definitely no facebook/twitter. But they managed to be friends. I never asked, what kind of things they usually write to each other. And my parents never really reveal this part of details to us (my brother and I). So, I guess, this is one of those things that they just want to keep it as confidential matter.. hihihi..

They've been mail-buddy for quite sometime because, they only meet for the first time when my father is already in the army. If I remember this correctly, he was stationed in Kluang, Johor. He had some kind of training or something in Taiping, which bring him to the state of Perak. He rides his scrambler motorcycle from Kluang to Taiping together with a friend. I repeat.. ride!!! After the whatever-business-he-had-in Taiping ended, my father's friend invited him to go ride with him to Sg Siput to meet somebody, who I don't remember who. Perhaps his family.

So, while riding south to Sg Siput, he came to a junction where one directed to Sg Siput and one directed to KUALA KANGSAR. Out of sudden, he thought of mom. What he said next, was really the turning point of the story.

Ishak: Eh, aku ade kawanla kat Kuala Kangsar. Aku ingat aku tak jadi ikut kau pegi Sg. Siput.

The friend is OK with that, and they both continue the journey in separate ways. My father reached Kuala Kangsar not long after. From the letters he always wrote to mom, he knows what is the name of the kampung he should head to. The only problem is that, he don't know where and how to find the exact house. Luckily, there's a small grocery shop at the village So, he decided to stop there and ask. Tauke kedai runcit must know everybody, he thought.

Yes! He did know everybody. In fact, the owner knows mom personally too. So. he himself, helped my father to give directions to mom's house. I can't recall if my father ever told me his feeling at the time. Anxious? Nervous? Excited? But I'm sure he is very brave of doing this. Never have met mom at all. And there he was, riding his scrambler to mom's house. When arrived, he did not only meet my mum for the first time, but he met Opah too. When asked about, what he thought of mom when they first met, he said, mom looks smaller than he thought. I was like.. that's it? But that's all he's willing to share. huhuhu...

Even without the exact details of everything, I always consider their 'Meet Day' as the best story ever! This, I think had put a very high standard to my mum and I on how I would meet 'My Guy' and how 'The Guy' should treat me. My father was very gentlemen and respectful in his way. From the first meet and later meets that follows, he always come to mom's house first, ask permission from Opah to take mom's out and so on. And this perhaps had put an expectation to me, that someone I date should be at least very respectful, if not very gentlemen-ly. I may have had my 'Meet Cute'(s). One perhaps belong to my 'jodoh' Or, I may yet to experience greater 'Meet Cute'(s) in the future. hmmm...

Life without My-Vince

2011-10-22T00:36:00.000-07:00

Wow! I actually had lived without a car for more than 3 months!! The only car available at home is a manual car which I'm so suck at driving it, which make, my mum and the rest of house members as my official driver.

Throughout this period.. I enjoy not paying for car loans. I enjoy not have to be the only person that mum has to depend on to do anything or to go anywhere. I like it that I contribute less to air pollution. I like it that I save so much of not spending on petrol. I like it (sometimes) that I go to Carrefour or Wangsa Walk or Rampai LRT station walking.

But... there are also a couple of things that I do not like...

I hate taking public transport. OK, I seldom go to office. But instead of usual 30 mins drive from home to 1Utama, it actually took me 2 hours to 1Utama by public transport. It not even cost savings (perhaps, just slightly) and definitely not time savings! I hate waiting and wasting time. That's why I don't like to go to office. Even with driving, I can lost at least 30 mins where that 30 mins, I can perhaps finish 1 or 2 budget report or even better, an extra sleeping time. hahaha..

I hate depending on people too. I'm so used to of doing anything or going anywhere by myself. So, it is tiring that you need other people to help you to go somewhere. Not everybody or everytime, people are free and available for you. I always feel bad if I need to bother anybody or being such a hassle although the person may be sincerely and willingly helpful. Maybe I should not have to feel so bad. But hey, it's just an imah-desease kind of thing. I just can't help it.

I hate to make decisions. It's easy if you like a certain car and money is never a problem. No point of liking this 1 car but you can't even afford the monthly payment. I was going through so many doubts and second thoughts on what my second car would be. The situation is like I just get a divorced and now I'm searching for my second husband. Obviously I want my second husband to be better than the last one. And this time, I need to make sure that I got the 'blessing' from my whole family in hope this time it can last longer. Uuurgh! I just hate deciding and it was so hard to make up my mind.

Thank God. All that is already in the past. Thanks to Him, for helping me to get through the period without my dear 'Vince' and help to guide me through making the decision. I know I would be lost without You.

p/s: I still missed my 'Vince'.

Oh No! Not me please...

2011-05-18T02:18:00.000-07:00

I don't mind be friend with a married man. I have friends who are. While some, I have their wife as my friend as well, but there are also some that I do not. Whether I know their wife or not or their wife know me or not, I know my limit as a friend and respect their marital status. As far as I know myself, I do not have any feelings to any of my married friends. Of course I do have a lil' bit of interest to 1 or 2 of them before, but the feeling did not continue once they have officially 'owned' by other women.

I do have an issue however, if the friend would like to take an advantage of our friendship and trying to get 'itchy'. If they are a true friend, and really know me, they would never ever trying to make a move on me or even thinking about it. I knowla I'm 'andartu'. But, pleasela don't let that give you an idea that I can consider anybody and entertain your 'itchiness'. It's not that I'm against poligamy. If it was written in my fate that my 'jodoh' is with a married man, then I do need to accept that. Dah jodoh kan? But I know that the decision will come if and only if the situation is right and it is for the good and happiness for all parties and not my own.

I can't predict the future. And I don't know where my heart will 'fall' and all. But I do appreciate the co-operations of all my married friends or any other married man out there (who might read this) that if you are looking for a new 'branch' please please and please..try your best to look at other area and not mine.

Ada Apa Dengan Cinta

2011-04-13T09:32:00.000-07:00

Terjumpa this 1 piece of paper in 1 of my old CD. I thought it was the lyrics print - Most international CD album do not include the lyrics of the songs rite. So, I will usually print of the lyrics myself, and put it inside the CD.. hihihi.. But it was something else - a short poem, I wrote a couple years ago for my self-made Valentine cards and wishes. While reading it, I was like..did I wrote this? hahahah..

Dalam rumah ada bilik..
Dalam bilik ada almari
Dalam almari ada baju
Dalam baju ada tubuh
Dalam tubuh ada hati
Dalam hati ada cinta
Dalam cinta.. ada segalanya..

Contest : Family Sedondon

2011-02-27T22:37:00.000-08:00

This is my picture with my extended family. Gambar ini diambil waktu majlis persandingan sepupu adik ipar imah kat Semenyih, Selangor, awal tahun hari tuh. Kalau bab kenduri kahwin, keluarga diorang nih memang paling sporting. Cakapla, tema kahwin kaler aper, gerenti boleh at least 90% sedondon punyer. Belum masuk bab posing gambar lagi. Gambar di atas adalah buktinya. :D

Ultimate Love Song

2011-02-16T07:03:00.000-08:00

Last year I did the Top 10 favorite romantic/love movie. So this year, I'm doing the list for my favorite love songs of all time. This is definitely very hard because there are thousands of wonderful love songs out there. But through time these songs had meant a lot to me

Girlfriend - N'Sync feat Nelly
"Would you be my girlfriend?"

I do not have so many experiences falling in love or have a special someone I can called 'my boyfriend'. This song was a hit when I have one. We danced to this song while he lip-sync the chorus to me. He was lucky that the DJ decided to play the song that night. If not, he probably, need to postpone the question to other night then. hahaha.

p/s: If JC or JT ever asked me that question.. I will definitely say "hell, yeah".. (sambil terlompat2 dgn gedixnyer)

I want to spend the my lifetime loving you - Marc Anthony & Tina Arera
Most duet songs are revolve around the theme of love. There's a lot of very memorable duet songs like One Sweet Day, Endless Love, My Heart, Senja Nan Merah, Ceritera Cinta, Cinta etc etc that I can list on, but I decided to choose this 1 in my list instead :)

For the rest of my life - Maher Zain
OK. I'm one of those who also 'infected' with the Maher Zain phenomenon :)

Tanpa Kekasihku - Agnes Monica
This is one sad love song. Obviously, there are times in our life that we lost somebody dearest in our heart. Below are a few lines of the songs that I like and really touch my heart..

"Kubiarkan senyumku, menari diudara.. Biar semua tahu, kematian tak mengakhiri... cinta..."

"Di mana letak syurga itu..Biar kugantikan tempatmu denganku..Adakah tanda syurga itu..Biar kutemukan untuk bersamamu"

Until the end of time - Innuendo
This is one of the most romantic wedding-theme song coming from a Malaysian artist. I would definitely will feature this song in my wedding (when it happens 1 day..)

"And I give my heart and soul, I give it all to you.. to you..All my hopes and dreams are in this wedding ring..I love you.. until the end of time"

Full lyrics

p/s: I love Innuendo!!! Had huge crush on Reymee. Big time!

My All - Mariah Carey
My ultimate favorite song. It's not really related to me or my love life. Perhaps, because I love this song so much, I used to sing this song to my exes on the phone at night..hahaha.. The memory really bring smile to my face now..
p/s: Poyo-nyer I...

Sesungguhnya - Raihan
I believe that the greatest love of all is the love to the Allah. And, to feel that we are loved by the Him. And, we are blessed by Him.

"Tuhan hadiahkanlah kasih Mu kepadaku..Tuhan kurniakanlah rinduku kepada Mu..Moga ku tahu..Syukur ku hanyalah milik Mu"

Full lyrics

Kau Kekasihku - Siti Nurhaliza
"Dari mata..Dari jiwa yang berahi..Kini kumengerti istilah percintaan ini..Moga nanti ada seru menyatakan..kau kekasihku hingga ke akhirnya.."

"From my eyes.. From my passionate soul.. I've understand the meaning of this love..Perhaps they will be time.. a sign to say.. you're mine..until the end of time"

I had a number of disappointment and heartbreak in love. I have used that part of the lyrics of this songs in several occasions, as my "last-ever-love-note-I-will-ever-send-to-you". You can note that I even have 2 versions of it to cater different audiences. hahahah..

Hello - Lionel Ritchie/David Cook
"Hello? Is it me you're looking for?"

I think, I have this questions on my mind so many time. I'm such a fool when it comes to love, flirt, sign language etc etc. The lyrics of this song mentioned about "tell me how to win you heart.. coz I haven't got a clue". And yes, most of the time, I really don't have a clue. And because of that, I lost quite a few of someones whom I like because I have not acted very well in this pre-love mind games. Well, perhaps it's not really meant to be rite?

p/s: I love David Cook's version...

I Love You - Celine Dion
I have to pick this Celine Dion song! Period! :D
Plus, I do believe in the power of these 3 words.

Petua Untuk Rajin Bersolat

2010-12-23T20:05:00.000-08:00

Jika anda ingin jadi orang yang rajin mengerjakan Solat, amalkanlah doa ini. Bacalah selalu Surah Ibrahim: Ayat 40

"Rabbij 'alnii muqiimaSSalaati wa min dzurriyyatii, Rabbana wataqabbal du'aa'."

Maksudnya: "Wahai Tuhanku! Jadikanlah daku orang yang mendirikan sembahyang dan demikianlah juga zuriat keturunanku. Wahai Tuhan kami, perkenankanlah doa permohonanku."

Surah Ibrahim: Ayat 40-43
[40] Wahai Tuhanku! Jadikanlah daku orang yang mendirikan sembahyang dan demikianlah juga zuriat keturunanku. Wahai Tuhan kami, perkenankanlah doa permohonanku.
[41] Wahai Tuhan kami! Berilah ampun bagiku dan bagi kedua ibu bapaku serta bagi orang-orang yang beriman, pada masa berlakunya hitungan amal dan pembalasan.
[42] Dan janganlah engkau (wahai Muhammad) menyangka Allah lalai akan apa yang dilakukan oleh orang-orang yang zalim; sesungguhnya Dia hanya melambatkan balasan mereka hingga ke suatu hari yang padanya terbeliak kaku pemandangan mereka, (kerana gerun gementar melihat keadaan yang berlaku).
[43] (Dalam pada itu) mereka terburu-buru (menyahut panggilan ke padang Mahsyar) sambil mendongakkan kepala mereka dengan mata tidak berkelip dan hati mereka tidak bersemangat (kerana bingung dan cemas).

p/s: M always struggling to discipline myself to fulfill this very important Rukun Islam. Hopefully, I'll get better with it in the future... Amiiin.

It's not just RM10...

2010-12-21T21:57:00.000-08:00

I and family went to this Konsert Ria at i-City Shah Alam on Sunday. People said the place is beautiful at nights. So, I was feeling quite anxious to see it. Since we're bringing Zulaika with us, I've reminded mum to pack her stroller, so that I don't have to 'dukung' her all the time. Although, she likes to walk by herself, but at times when she's so tired and there's a lot of people, she'll got scared, and prefer that I carry her in my arms. So stroller is a compulsary equipment for an outdoor outings. While we were well equipped with the stuffs for Zulaika's comfort, we all forgot about ourself.

When we arrived, it was raining. And, we did not have any umbrella in the car. There were always a couple in the car previously. But, sometimes, I will drive my brother's car. So, those things had been moved to his car too. Luckily there was a shop there that sell umbrella. It was the first shop we went and they promote to us the only umbrella they have left on sale. It looks like a good umbrella and it was RM10. Don't want to be so picky, I just bought it.

The umbrella did serve us good in a couple of minutes under the soft raining condition. Not long after that, the rain had stopped and I closed the umbrella. However, not so long after that, it was raining again. Quite heavily this time. Mum tried to open the umbrella. But this time, the umbrella did not open as fully as it should. We both pull up, pull down and do all sorts of pulling and pushing to get that umbrella operated, but failed. We already far away from the shops and we don't have any roof-tops near to us either. We just stand under the umbrella and hold it from under to cover both of us. Feels like in 'Memori Daun Pisang' video clip ..But if I were happenned to be trapped under the rain like that with a boyfriend, maybe syokla jugak kan.. hehehe

While we were under the umbrella, I can't help but cursing that sales-person. What kind of person selling faulty product like that?? Don't even last for 1 hour??!!! Wasted my RM10 just like that...haiyah.. Luckily mum was present when I bought it. So I kind of had asked for permission and agreement to buy it. If not, I will surely kena with my mum..At that time, I had wished that, "OK, kau rugikan duit orang 10 hengget, hopefully nanti kau rugi 100 hengget!!"

OKla, cursing him like that is a little over-reacting la.. Plus RM1o is nothing really. But I just can't tolerate people who doing things for profit. I understand that not all products are perfect. But for a thing that can only lasted for a few minutes. It's just too much and so not acceptable.

Malang tak Berbau

2010-12-20T20:46:00.000-08:00

I had one of the craziest weekends of my life. I never had went out and came back home at after 2am for 2 weekend nights in a row. At least this years la.. I'm not counting my clubbing years la kan.. hehehe..

I was karaoke-ing with Ayu and frens on Saturday nite at Au2 Jusco Song Box. I always called that place as 'karaoke jamban'..hehehe..To my surprise, they also have a large room that looks like any other karaoke room in Malaysia. So, they do have some posh jamban there. hahahah.. Although the sound system is a bit off, but the song selections, are not too bad. If I want to compare with the the ones I went at Wangsa Walk Mall, this place is much better. At least, I don't have a lot of "laa..lagu nih tak adela..." moment. Had so much fun that night. I sang A LOT!!!! From the latest songs to the jiwang karat songs.. Not just that, I screamed a lot too. All the guys can definitely sing. Was very impressed wih all of them singing all sorts of rock songs. Kalah Awie and Amy Search..:)

My highlight of the nite was definitely not the karaoke session. I don't know what to called this incident really. Since the place is near to Ayu's house, I decided to crash at her place first. We then, pool into a car (which is not my car) to Jusco. Being me, I would usually drive my own car there, since it will be easy for me to go back later. But I decided not to. Maybe because the distance is just so near, so I don't really care or maybe I was so excited to ride on Anem's n hubby's new Honda City car.. hahahah..Half way through the session, I just realised I don't have my mobile with me. I LEFT IT IN MY CAR!!! It's quite usual for me to left my mobile in my car, but not until later, I realise that leaving that lil thing in the car can cause me trouble later. Without my mobile, I don't really know and aware of time. Syok sgt menyanyi, I don't really care, although usually I care, especially if mum is at home alone. 12 midnite is my limit. My brother plak, happen to be at Rawang that weekends for her uncle's -in-law wedding.

They were adding more hours to the supposed original sessions and I just followed on. Not until when Anem n hubby were about to go back, it hit me that I need to go back too. It was already 1am and I can't afford to add in 1 more hour to go back. So I left my GF and the rest to continue and joined Anem. She gave me a lift to Ayu's place to get to my car. At the Jusco parking space, I already took out my car key from my handbag, as in doing the early preparationsla. So, when I got out from Anem's car, I don't have to rummage through the dark to find my key. So, once arrived in front of Ayu's place, I got out from the car and just walked to my car. Anem n hubby already left and I was looking for the key. Then, I realised that MY CAR KEY WAS NOT IN MY HANDS!!! I gelabah2 search for it in my handbag. OH NO!!! IT'S NOT IN THE HANDBAGS TOO!!! Then.. another OH NO!!!! MY HANDPHONE IS IN THE CAR!!! I can't call Anem to patah balik!!!! I was like SHIT! SHIT! SHIT! What have I done to myself?

OK. I told myself. Since Jusco is still near, I can go back there and asked Ayu to call Anem. Maybe she was not yet far away. So, I decided to walk back to Jusco. After just a few steps, I saw a taxi and it is available. Then, I just told myself. OKla, I should just go back home and use the spare key at home to pick up the car at Ayu's place in the morning and go pick the other key at Anem's place later later. Luckily, Ayu's place and mine is like sekangkang kera jer, so, it does not cost me that much. On my way back, I know that mum will surely freaked out, especially now I also don't have my house keys and obviously I need to wake her up to open the door.

When mum's open the door for me, she was like, "What happened? Where's your keys?" I told her what happened. She was, for the first time did not really say anything about it. Of course she had a few questions on the 'how come' part, but she did not flipped. Maybe a bit. But, not that bad. Since I'm like careless all the time. This kind of story did not really surprised her that much. When she asked, how am I going to pick up my car tomorrow.. I just easily answer, I'll use the spare key to pick it up tomorrow. It seems, my 'malang tak berbau' did not end there. What my mum said later, makes me gelabah again.

"Kunci spare tuh kat Ajimla.." my mum said. I was like OH NO!!! SHIT!! SHIT!! SHIT!! all over again. I obviously cannot asked him to come back home, since the wedding is tomorrow, which mum and I will be going. With that Myvi car. Which is now stranded in front of Ayu's house. My brother will surely be busy with all sorts of preparations. You knowla, kenduri kat kampung.. most of the stuffs are not outsource. I was also worried that Ayu will need to drive out to go somewhere tomorrow, since my car is blocking the way now. So many things on mind. Cursing myself is one thing. To think of how to settle it tommorow is another. My brain at that time was no longer working as efficiently as it should. So, I just told mum, I'll settle it tomorrow, and went straight to bed.

It was really crazy. If David Teo is reading this, he surely can make $8M box-office movie out of this.. hahahah.. I never thought that, that night will be such an eventful night for me. siiiigh... Malang memang sangat sangat tak berbau.

p/s: Thanks to Anem and hubby kerana sanggup bersusah payah tolong hantarkan kunci keta imah hari Ahad tuh.. jasamu sangat2 dikenang. To my sayang Ayu, thanks for the fun nite and parking space free for the night.. hehehe..

Masalah...Masalah...

2010-12-16T01:29:00.000-08:00

I feel that, lately I've been surrounded with problems and sadness. Not just my own. But others too.

Last week, we lost yet another significant male figure in the family. Allahyarham Zainal b. Mas'od, my late father, younger brother. He was the eldest uncle in our family after my father's death. And, he was just 50. This news is such a big blow to the family. In the span of 6 years, the family had lost its 3 leading man. And recently, one of my aunty had been diagnosed with a kidney failure as well. I really pity nyai, since she has to face all of her child's pain and deaths in front of her eyes. One of my aunty even mentioned that, she can't bear to go through anymore death in the family anymore. Yeah.. I can understand that.. Loss is just too painful..

Now, I'm seeing one more problem in front of me. And living with me as well. Once in a while. This problem come in a form of 3/4 years old girl. That's what the parents told us la.. Although I doubt so. Because I think she probably be already 5/6 years old. Doesn't matterla what her age is. Her father related to me while the mother is not. Plus, not Malaysian. You can guessla where her mother comes from. My mum had helped the parents to care for the child while the parents are working. I don't kow what the father is really doing but the mother is a factory-worker who do like 24hrs work-shifts and stay over at the factory-hostel. So, the child will stay with us like everyday until the parents come to pick her up at whenever time they feel convenient. Just imagine, how she was put under strangers house before for days and days. There's a lot of stories behind this la, on how the father left his former wife and 5 childrens (with 1 is an OKU) and also he had cut the connection between the other family as well. So, we have not known what had happened to him and his life with this new wife. Although we had the assumptions that the wife had used some 'guna-guna' to this girl's father, but it does not looked like, the wife is living the easy life too. With the kid's identity is still unknown, with the parents marriage certificate is in the blurr, (obviously the nikah was not performed under Jabatan Agama), the kid has no birth certificate..no MyKid..her age is increasing and obviously will need an education at some point. I have no idea where the future of this child is. Wow..headachela.. I can't really handle this kind of drama in my life. It's just too messy and I don't think I want to be involved.

So, here, I'm just stating the major setbacks that are happening rite? Just imagine that I have a lot more on my plate to settle. My thoughts are keep on bombarding with all these issues. And this definitely is not doing good at all for my 'Law of Attraction' practice. That's why sometimes, it feels good to be out from home and work and have good time with friends. It definitely feels good to be out from problems once in awhile :)

Salam Maal Hijrah

2010-12-06T02:49:00.000-08:00

"Allah SWT berselawat ke atas penghulu kami Muhamad SAW, ahli keluarga dan sahabat-sahabat baginda dan kesejahteraan ke atas mereka.

Wahai Tuhan, Engkaulah yang kekal abadi, yang qadim. yang awal dan ke atas kelebihanMu yang besar dan kemurahanMu yang melimpah dan ini adalah tahun baru yang telah muncul di hadapan kami.

Kami memohon pemeliharaan dariMu di sepanjang tahun ini dari Syaitan dan pembantu-pembantunya dan tentera-tenteranya dan juga pertolongan terhadap diri yang diperintahkan melakukan kejahatan dan usaha yang mendekatkanku kepadaMu Wahai Tuhan Yang Maha Agung dan Maha Mulia.

Wahai Tuhan Yang Maha pengasih dari mereka yang mengasihi dan Allah berselawat ke atas penghulu kami Muhamad. Nabi yang ummi dan ke atas ahli keluarga dan sahabat-sahabatnya dan kesejahteraan ke atas mereka"

Law of Attraction

2010-12-01T08:12:00.000-08:00

Continuation from the seminar I went last Saturday.. I was drawn into this 'Law of Attraction' concept. I can't really explain about the quantum physics side of it and how this relate to the universe and gravity and how our thoughts can meet each other and stuffs. But a few highlights that I can point in here...

"Birds of a feather flock together"
Law of attraction states that like attracts like. "Whatever you want, wants you"

"you can change your life because you can change the way you think"
The Law of Attraction simply says that, everything you have in life, you attracted to yourself because of the way you think.

“If you do not attract what you want to be, you will be what you are, FOREVER”

– Ankur Sancheti

"your thoughts are extremely powerful"
Thoughts are a form of mental energy that travel at the speed of light. They are so fine that they can go through any barriers. This is why, for example, you can think about a person, sometimes at a great distance, and in the next moment, he phone will ring and that person will be on the line. Your thoughts have connected with that person the moment you thought of them.

"Believe the genie in you"
Sometimes, we can hear people complain about their hardship. "Why bad things always happenned to me?" "Why I can't get the job that can give me 1 year bonus?" "Why I always got short of cash?".Law of attraction does not distinguish between what is good or what is not. The genie in you would answer, “You attracted it, so, you are given”, “Your wish is my command”. In fact, the worse your life might seem, the higher the probability that the genie is working hard of fullfilling your every fear (emotion), thought (expectation) and insight. Thus, we need to always check on our thoughts and attractions, what we attract should be in sync with what we want.

I believe that Law of attraction can be applied in every path of our life (be it attracting a dream life, to attract wealth, money or abundance, to attract a dream job, to find a perfect soul mate, to make a better relationship, in nutshell to get what you badly want). Unconciously, I already applied law of attraction in most of the path of my life, both the positive (what I want) and negative (what I do not want) side of it. Since, I'm more aware of it now, I should, from now on to start visualise on the things that I WANT ONLY and attract those that I want, so it can be true one day. Insya Allah....

I Dreamed a Dream

2010-11-28T21:22:00.000-08:00

I went to a seminar yesterday. The topics were mostly inpirational and motivational stuffs. The 'Yes-You-Can!!' type, if you know what I mean. One of the things that really get to me that day was when the speaker showed the video of Susan Boyle when she was auditioning for the Britain's Got Talent show. I watched some of her youtubes before but not this one. I really got the chill when she sang in that audition. I almost cried my heart out watching it. It was just so inspirational. It is a perfect example of 'never judge a book by its cover'. I learned that, one, you can find inspirations from unexpected source. It's not always that skinny - peferct skin - super intelligent woman can inspire you to be confident. Two, it's never too late to chase your dream. If you belive in yourself, the ability and the talent that you have, when the opportunity presented in front of you, you should grab it. Three, I should never make fun of other people's dream and goals. We can always say to people dearest to us, saying that his/her dream is ridiculous.. like "Jangan nak berangan la...", "Cermin diri tu dulu" and so on and so on. Like thinking, only people who were smart in school can be successful and millionaires. Girls who are beautiful and hot can get a rich and good looking husband. How that can be so wrong at times..

I'm a Victim?

2010-11-12T00:43:00.000-08:00

I was actually trying to psycho-analyse myself. I don't know... living in this difficult world and era.. people are living in desperations and are willing to do everything and anything to survive. I always feel like I'm being used all the time. Sometimes, I don't mind being used because what I did was just an act of kindness or respect to that person(s). But, there definitely time when I feel very uncomfortable and doubting the motives of other people's towards me. I start question myself. Am I the victim of many manipulators in this world?

I, like most of people who does not have any formal knowledge on something, turn to Wikipedia to help me get the answers. hahaha.. Okla kan.. I can't afford psychiatrist ma...

According to Braiker as quoted in the Wikipedia, manipulators exploit the following vulnerabilities (buttons) that may exist in victims:
1. the "disease to please" - I think I have this 'disease'. At least my mum dah puas manipulated me on a lot of things since I like it so much to please her.. :p
2. addiction to earning the approval and acceptance of others - Not so much on this. I'm not a person who cares so much whether ppl 'approve' me or like me or otherwise. If they don't.. too bad la kan..
3. Emotophobia (fear of negative emotion) - Shit! This's such a big words. Some more..no Wiki page is exist to further explain this to me. hmm.. fear of negative emotion? I pass..
4. lack of assertiveness and ability to say no - yeah.. I have a little of this other disease as well. I'm a 'YES' woman. Anything can one. People ask this and that.. I gerenti can do one.. But only to certain things la kan.. Good manipulators will know my weak spot and I will not be able to say 'No'.. huhuhu.. this one is scaryla..
5. blurry sense of identity (with soft personal boundaries) - I laugh of to this one coz a lot of people said that I'm blur.. hahaha.. not sure if my blur is related to this blurry sense...whatever.
6. low self-reliance - hmm.. I'm quite independent really. I don't think I rely on other people so much.
7. external locus of control - external 'locus' means that the person believe that their environment, some higher power, or other people control their decisions and their life. This is quite tricky. . I'm thinking harder about this 1. I feel like what I choose to do in life basically are what I want. But, if what I want is actually already been controlled by other people, let say my parents, then I can't really 100% believe that I control my own decisions and life?

Am I the favourite victims of the manipulators out there? I don't know.. What do u think?

5 Months Recap

2010-11-10T07:59:00.000-08:00

Wow!!! It's been awhile.. (I'm not too sure if 5 months can consider as awhile though).. So much stuffs that I had missed to share in here.. one probably my trip to KK.. had so much fun.. Ate a lot!!!! Got to see the magnificent Mount Kinabalu.. Once there, I feel like, I one day, want to climb it.. Need to get my stamina in place first.. huhuhu.. and partner(s) to climb with too..

Some of you may already know about this.. that my mum moved out from our house in Wangsa Maju to live with Opah at Bkt Sentosa in July.. live in separation with Zulaika was really tough.. I almost broke to tears everytime saying goodbye to her on Sunday.. So sad to see her crying and wanting to follow me back to KL.. Not only that, I also thought that life would be super-jolly not living under the same roof as mum, but it was not so much the case.. I was too complacent with mum around in the house doing all the dirty laundry and housekeeping and cooking etc etc.. To get myself to do-everything-yourself routines were super tough.. I was so kind to give mum my car.. well, for groceries shopping and stuffs.. Thus, I was relying on public transport to go to work and anywhere!!! what i can say is.. KL public transportation system is SUX!!!! Big time! Particularly the bus and komuter.. I just can't remember how many hours I had wasted on just waiting.. well..

2 weeks before Hari Raya, I decided to stay at Bkt Sentosa to support my mum caring for Opah - with Opah was not at her usual strength, and Zulaika with her 'ragam', an additional little cousin who my mum 'accidentally' baby-sit.. plus it was still Ramadhan month and most of the aunties will only come near to Hari Raya.. so, my mum was really in need for an extra hands.. So much chaos.. Lots of family drama.. I can't believe that the few weeks I stayed there were the last few weeks of Opah as well.. Yes, she's old. But she's healthy. I did not expect that her time has come.. Although I did had my share of tension-breakdown staying with her, I felt so blessed that I had the opportunity to care for her during those last moments.. Experience that I will cherish forever..

Now, life is back to normal.. Everybody are now back in Wangsa Maju and that's why, I can have the time to actually do this.. hehehe..

For Sale...

2010-06-02T07:33:00.000-07:00

We are putting the below dining table (6 seats) for sale. If you know any antique furniture lover who might be interested, left me a message, kay?

Price: RM500 nego. Shipping Method: Self-Pick. Condition: Good. Made: Kayu Jati. P.O.B: Kalimantan, Indonesia

Train Story

2010-05-31T06:26:00.000-07:00

Since it's a wedding season and everybody from my age and younger are getting married, the subject of my marital status, popped up as the main topic of discussion again. Just when I think I'm off the hook, the wedding season is coming..siiiiiiigh.

My mum thinks I missed my train already. And I can't blame anyone but myself that I decided not to take the earlier train(s), given the fact that she's aware of a number of trains that had passed by. She knows that some had made the stop. She also knows that, not only I refused to get on those train(s), I would make myself as far as possible from any train station if I know the fact that the train(s) had made and will make the stop for me. Made myself unavailable..sort of. hahahah..

What can I do... At that time, the ones that stopped were LRT-type train, i.e. guys with 'ready to get married now' status But, I prefer, KTM Senandung Malam train instead, i.e. guys 'not ready to get married yet' status. So, I can't really blame myself of not ready to take the LRT train. They're just too fast for me that they scared the hell out of me. But now, it's a different story la kan..hehehe.. I would be crazy to still prefer KTM Senandung Malam.. hahahah..

p/s: It took me 8hrs to get to JB by train!!! Mmg giler!!! Tak taula bila Malaysia nak capai tahap ader keretapi laju ke negeri2 di Malaysia.. huhuhu

SAYA TAK BERANI

2010-04-20T01:00:00.000-07:00

As open minded as I am. I'm totally in the 'No sex before marriage' team. Not even a person as hot as Brad Pitt can tempt or seduce me to cross over. perrrgh.. Easy for me to say la kan. Since nobody in that hotness level had ever tried on me any way.. hehehe..

There were people (mostly guys who want to get into my pants la kan..), who will debate about my choice about this matter. Their argument is that I won't do it (the sex before marriage) because of the religion. And, if I'm not Muslim, I would do it. See.. how guys can manipulate your mind and make you surrender? If they can't seduce you.. they will argue with you.. huhuhu.. What I can say.. it's not easy to resist temptations, I tell you.. But, there reasons why I still survive.. SO FAR.. hehehe..

Of course, the top reason of it is religion. I've done a lot of the 'small' sins (dosa kecik) myself, which if accumulate them all, can considered as 'big'..huhuhu.. So, I definitely don't want to touch the 'big' sins category. Apart of that, I always think of consequences in any of my actions. What good things I can get out of it? Thinking about it, I say, I would probably get nothing more than the pleasure of the moment. Whereas if I join the opposite team, I would put myself in jeopardy of degrading myself.. getting myself pregnant accidentally.. and in the most unlucky situation, I may get AIDS.. plus, if anything happenned, my parents, my family would get the shame.. Even if I put the religion factor aside, thinking of all the wrong possibilities that can happen, turn me off completely. Even the thickest condom in the world can't throw that thoughts away.

That's why, I don't understand why many young girls out there would dare to put themself in jeopardy of all that consequences.. Maybe they just being a total idiot or lust get the better of them. Who knows eh?

My bigger concern now however, not about the decreasing number of virgin girls (especially amongst Muslim/Malay girls). I don't think I care enough if they are virgin or not. They big enough to think what's right and what's wrong. Doing it (the sex), itself shows that they are already an adult. Although they might not have a brain like one.. But, I am concern about the increasing number of babies being thrown away to death. Really sad to watch the news and see all the horrifying pictures in the newspaper. How can a person do such cruel thing? What's the point of going through the 9 months pregnancy period, then 'murder' it? It just didn't make sense at all. Stupid right?

I understand, in this situation, we can get scared and panic. That would be what I'll feel. However, they would have more than sufficient time to really think about what they want to do. About the baby and themself. At least 7 months to really think and make a decision. Put you baby in rubbish dump or flush it in toilet should not be the options. Don't be afraid to go to the families/ parents. If not, they are organisations that can help and assist. Berani buat berani tanggungla kan..

KARMA

2010-04-18T22:57:00.000-07:00

What goes around, comes around eh? I don't know if I really believe in Karma. But, sometimes, fate does happen in that way. Buat baik dibalas baik..buat jahat dibalas buruk, katanya..

I feel like I've been unkind to a lot of people (guys) in the past. Maybe unconciously done. I may have break the hearts of many. Some may be forgiven and let the past be bygones. But perhaps, they are a few who had cursed me and I'm not out of it yet. Like Mahsuri with her 'padang jarak padang terkukur selama 7 keturunan'.. huhuhu.. matila if I'm cursed until 7 keturunan..

I'm always been labelled by this lot of people as sombong, jual mahal, takde parasaan etc etc. I always like to deny it, because I think I am not. But, since lots of this words had been thrown to my face, I start to doubt myself. To my defense, sometimes, I'm cold towards certain guys because I don't want to hurt their feelings or give them false hope. In some cases, I did still hurt their feelings and sort of offended them. "Ala.. poyolah imah tu. Macamla aku nak kat dia sangat" attitude.

So, I was thinking.. maybe I repelled guys so much. Now, guys are repelling me?

My Top 10 Love/Romantic Movies

2010-02-20T08:32:00.001-08:00

This post was meant for Valentine's Day theme..obviously I'm way behind schedule..hehehe.. Apparently, I have so much time thinking of the Top 10 list of my favourite Love/Romance/Chick Flick Movies when what I should be doing is.. list out my Top 10 potential Valentine date?

10. Titanic
This film is just a must have in anyone favourite love movies-Top 10 list regardless of whether they really like this movie or not. It's a typical "antara 2 darjat" love story really..Only that, Leonardo is still cute and you can see Kate Winslet naked (you can practically see her naked in most of her films anyway but still...with that huge blue diamond necklace, it's just soo different and special.. :p) However, I love tragic. Happily ever after love story is just lame and 'yucky' at times. So, watching a sad-ending movie once in awhile can be refreshing..

9. You've Got Mail
I love Meg Ryan!! She's definitely 1 of the queen of romantic movies of all time. Sleapless in Seattle, When Harry Met Sally, Addicted to Love, French Kiss.. I love them all!! It's just that I love this 1 more.. The cyber-virtual relationship thingy does it for me I guess..

8. Never Been Kissed
I read the novel first and loved it. I can relate to the story at that time with me never been kissed..waiting for the right guy..and the perfect kiss and all..hehehe.. When I got to know that a film was made based on this novel, I was so anxious to watch it. Since the movie is included in my Top 10 list, it means I love the movie too.

7. Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam
This is definitely my favourite Hindi movie. I love classic Indian settings. I like the chemistry between Salman and Aishu in the 1st part of the film.. Salman is in his goofy-foolish self who falls for a beautiful-naive Aishu. When you think that they will end up together until the end of the film, then bammm! Aishu is marrying Ajay Devgan plak. I set my mind to hate this Ajay character as the penyibuk in the story but nooo.. Sanjay Leela Bhansali chose to make his character as angelic as possible...go bring his wife Aishu all the way to Italy to unite her with her true love, katanya... but only for Aishu to really realise who her true love is at the end of the story.. I definitely had cried a river over this movie.. hehehe

6. Jerry Maguire
"You complete me"
When at almost an entire movie you think that this Jerry Maguire guy is a moron and a jerk.. he said this 3 lil words that practically change everything. Who won't fall for that huh? especially when a guy as cute and charming as Tom Cruise appear in your living room and confess that 3 magic words in front of your close friends and family?

5. He's Not That Into You
It's either Love Actually or this movie. I like this kind of movie whereas the story not just revolve around the leading man and woman. So, you would have the romantic couple, the funny ones, the break-ups ones, the sexy one.. all in a movie. The ensemble cast are great as well. The movie is about modern day relationships and how men and women often misconstrue the intentions of the opposite sex which I and a lot of people out there can relate to the story in this movie. The movie sort of self-acclaim that they are not 1 of those cliche chick flick film.. and I definitely agree.

4. A Walk to Remember
I admire any woman character who can influence a guy to be a better man..better person. It's such an accomplishment to be a reason behind any man's success or good life. Same as Never Been Kissed, I've read the novel before the movie came out. Since I loved the novel so much, and Landon Carter is just sooo sweet, this movie made it to my Top 10 list. I loved the soundtrack as well.

3. Memoirs of Geisha
You can do and be willing to do anything to be with the person you love. I can't imagine myself, falling in love with someone that obviously out of my league and do everything that I can so that I can be closer to him.. to get his attention and to be worthy of him. At times in the movie, I do feel like, "whyla this girl need to go through all those hassle just for a guy".. but I guess that's what makes it romantic. Sometimes it's not just guys who do all the efforts right?

2. Stardust
This movie story a journey of a boy (who then becomes a man) in a pursuit of a fallen star, to prove his love for a village beauty. Whose on earth would do that kann?? At first you may think it is ridiculous.. it is stupid and naive ("she just saying that to blew you off, honey.."). But, put all the magical nonsense apart.. his intentions and actions are 'meltingly' sweet.. and totally romantic.

1. Pride and Prejudice
I'm a sucker when it comes to vintage romance stuffs.. especially the British ones.. The falling in love part..the dating part.. the meet up part.. the proposal.. all look so in etique.. very gentleman-ish.. All this elements are very evident in the movie which I like. Apart from that, like other adaptation films, I like the movie because I like the story, i.e the novel and the characters.

God=Tuhan=Allah

2010-02-18T07:37:00.000-08:00

This is my first 2010 blog entry?? After half-way of February?? huhuhu.. I actually have a lot of things that I experienced last month which I would like to share and write about.. So, the next few new entries would be dedicated to those stories.

However, I do have a blog post draft on the issue of "Allah" being used by non-Muslim... I don't know what had happenned there that the writing got stuck half-way.. My lack of knowledge makes me feel that I don't have the right to express what I feel in this matter. In 1 thought, I would think that "what's the big deal?". In my other thought, my mind telling me that "Allah is the name of God (Tuhan) which I and all Muslims worship. Does the non-Muslim worship the same God that I do? If they are not (which I believe they are not), then why use Allah?".

Whatever confusion this issue had over me, whether it's wrong or right to allow non-Muslim to use "Allah"..the only thing that I certainly know is right...with my believe as a Muslim, God=Tuhan=Allah.

My Life of 2009

2009-12-30T19:11:00.000-08:00

Looking back at my 2009 moments..

January
My grandfather (my father side) passed away. I know that, he was never himself after my father's death. My father was his eldest son. One that he depends on much. Each time I met him. I can see that he suffers deeply and he missed his son so much that he feels like he doesn't have any purpose to live anymore. My grandmother told my mum, that yai (what we, the cucu all call him) read the very last letter that my late father wrote to him almost every night. From then, I started to realise, that it's actually harder for a parents to see their child passed away before them.

February/March
No major event that I care enough to remember.

April
I took a job at a tution centre, teaching Maths for Form3 students, teaching for the first time. I don't like teaching really. That is why I always against my mum's wishes asking me to become a lecturer. And I know for a fact that I can't teach, especially to the 'lembap' n 'manja' ones. No offence to them..But, not only that I don't have the patience. It's also quite hard for me to come to terms that things that I can understand is actually quite hard for other people to grasp. So my theory is, if you can't think like the 'lembap' ones. You won't be able to reach out to them and teach the way that they will understand. I can understand my way. But they may not rite?

Because of all that, my teaching part time career ended a few months later.. hahahaha..

May
One of my resolution this year is to be fit and have flat tummy..So, I signed up for gym membership in Fitness First. During my first few sessions, I had a few complimentary session with the trainer. Since I'm not hot enough (i.e wearing tight short pants and sexy t-shirt), no hot trainers interested to train me. I ended up with a short trainer instead. Such a blow.. But what the heck, eh..In a way, I should be relieved. At least, I can concentrate on working my own body rather than checking out the trainer's body..hahahaha..

It was really tough. In front of the trainers, he forced me to lift 5kg weight. But when I'm on my own..I cheat and lift the 2.5kg weight instead..hahaha.. Did I have the flat tummy I want and be more fit? hmm.. my answer is.. No comment. hahahah..

June
1 morning, my mum answered a call from someone we know. The conversation sounds like a very serious thing had happenned. I got a feeling that, it was not a good thing. At 1 point I hear my mom said, "Bolehla..Bawaklah dia datang sini..Biar Ecah bela"..hmmmm..

Once my mom put off the phone, I quicly asked, "What happenned?"

The next day.. a baby girl was presented to us. Her name is Nur Aishah Zulaika. It was the start for all of us to suddenly become a mum. I'm not married, and never had baby sister or brother. Thus, it's my first ever experience. My mum have not taken care any baby for 26 years. Thus, she is also sort of like a new mother as well.

Life certainly is not the same anymore...

July
Quite an eventful month. Had a few memorable activities with the RizAngels peeps. One of it was Hari Raya Photoshoot for MH Raya Bumper. (I didn't even manage to buy the magazine to frame it.. :p).

End of the month was my BIRTHDAY!!! Nothing to really be excited about. I don't celebrate it anyway. However, the highlight of the week was karaoke nite with Riz and the Angels. I was so lucky to be part of it. He sang a lot of songs that nite. Once he arrived, he conquered the mic all to himself. Since it's not always you got the opportunity to hear and watch a singer, singing in front your eyes. So, I don't mind not having the mic at all.. I got to sing "Ceritera Cinta" with him anyway..yeeepeee!!! (he sang beautifully... but I'm soo no close to Jaclyn Victor..hehehe.. Lucky sis Frizz helped me at end of the song to cover the high pitch part..)

August
My brother got engaged!!! And as you can see later.. the rest of the months of the year, were dedicated to his big day only.. huhuhu..

September/ October/ November
My life mostly evolve around work, baby Zulaika.. my brother's wedding preparation.

Not that I have a lot to prepare. really I just volunteer to do his hantaran. But, a lot of surveying work were involved. Went here and there to find good and cheap resources and trying to pick out ideas as well. The end result? Believe it or not.. I didn't even manage to take pics of my work. But I do have memoirs of it in a video. Thanks Pak Long..

Closer to the reception. My weekends, packed with house-to-house visits to my mum's closest friends. We planned to go to a lot of houses and personally invite a lot of them. But, after 1 or 2 weekends, our plan had not really go into plan. If we planned to go to 5 houses. We may end up getting 2. One thing about my mum is, (which I believe, I have this trait from her too), is not the kind of a person who like to hang out with friends, casually (she only goes out if there's an event or invitation) or go to friend's houses. Although, her friends are mostly welcoming kind of person, she just have this mindset, that her visit will disturb her friends - thinking that her friends may be busy with work, kids, husband.. whatever. So, you guys can imagine how excited her friends were, and after awhile not meeting each other, you can imagine the length of topics to share and story.

December
The Wedding... and that's ended my year.

Happy New Year peeps!!! and Welcome to 2010!!!

Expectation is arising...

2009-12-22T21:22:00.001-08:00

Congrats to my dear bro!!! Akhirnya dia telah bertemu dengan jodohnya..

Although technically he's my younger brother, but I always treat him as if he's my elder brother too.. (not because I juz simply want to perasan muda yer.. hehehe)..He's always ahead of me in many things.. He knows how to ride bicycle before I did. He had his driving license before me. He starts earn his living (i.e working) before me. And now, he weds before me..

I have no problem being 'dilangkah-bendul' to him. Even way back during my teenager years, I kind of knew that he will wed before me. And I sort of want him to. I don't know why but I always want him to marry before me..

My only problem now is.. people is starting to put expectations on me.. muchly anticipate for another wedding invitation with my name in it. Not only that.. people is now eager to wait for who I will marry and my wedding receptions..

They said: "Wedding imah nanti mesti lagi grand kan?"
Me: *gulp*

Reject Shop

2009-11-11T21:43:00.000-08:00

A few week's back, I was invited by IBM to attend a 3D 2N training program at Pullman Hotel, Putrajaya - It's My Business: Leading Change through T.O.P. It was a fun experience, and as per other similar training programme, days were packed with lots of activities started as early as 7am (the toughest one!!) and ended at 10pm..

1 of the activities during the program was "Reject Shop".. The game was simple.. Each of us had a cardboard stick on our back with a certain statement on it. Nobody is made aware of their own statement. We were required to play for 10 rounds. The objective is in each round, we need to form a partnership of 2 or more with each other and if combination of our statement is true, we got + points, - points if we don't. Further - points if we end up alone (i.e. fail to make any partner) in each round. The twist of this game was, we can't communicate verbally to each other.

OK.. I had no idea what was on my back and so as everybody else, except that we can look at what was on other's back. So the 1st round started. 1 of the first few person's back that I looked stated "Accept me in all rounds".. He already got a partner with him stated "Accept me if I'm older". Since that other person was also obviously older than me, I nodded eagerly towards them giving a signal that I can accept them. But then he had a look at my back and geleng his head. oooh.. potential successful partnership ruined. I was so disappointed. I said to myself, "Lucky him". I can imagine that people will be lining up to be his partner. I got closer to some people I know. 1 of them is Mira.. what she had on her back was.. "Reject me if I'm beautiful". I glanced at her face 1 time.. think..and glanced again at her face..Damnn.. she is beautiful. So, I 'honestly', rejected her. I went to another person, and what she had was "Reject me if you're taller than me". She's practically 1 of the smallest in the group. which made me automatically taller than her. So, I rejected her. Time is ticking, and I can't find any suitable partner yet. It's not that simple after all eh?.. Not to wasting any more time..I went to another person, and he had "Reject me if I'm holding a pencil". I didn't even have to think harder for this one. Immediately, I rejected him. Why? Since, we were given a pencil and a piece of paper to jot our marks in each round. So all of us, obviously was holding a piece of paper and a pencil. duh... 1st round ended not long after..I end up partner-less in the 1st round. I told myself, "No way, I will be able to win this..huhuhu" (me in my competitive mode.. wanting to win everything..hehehe).

Game continues.. I play the same way I was in the previous. Reading cardboard on people's back and make a decision whether they can be my partner or not. At the same time, others will read mine and 'signaled' their decision. After awhile, I realised something. If that person is wearing a watch, he/she will have the "Reject me if I'm wearing a watch". If that person is the tallest in the group, he/she will have the "Reject me if I'm taller than you". If that person is a happy-go-lucky type, he/she will have the "Reject me if I'm always smiling". Then, there's some people who got statement like "Reject me in ALL rounds" or "Reject me if you like me". How cruel is that? I was like.. what the F??!!.. they (I mean the facilitator people) purposely stick certain statement to a certain people, so that people will automatically/ will always be rejected.. The game started to bore me.. I neither not able to accept people nor be accepted. I played a few rounds partner-less. It's sucks to be rejected especially when you didn't know the reason why.

The facilitator actually noticed that I was 1 of some that consistently partner-less. He kept saying.
"If you're still end up with no partner, that's mean you're not playing with your head and you're not playing with your heart". I keep looking at him every time he said that. Knowing that, he'll repeat his statement to my face too. Maybe my usual 'blur' face gave him the impression that I still didn't get what he was saying. Or... just maybe, he was trying to help me to get a grasp on what I should do. Head and heart..Head..Brain...Think. OK. Got that 1.. Heart.. Heart...OK. It's related to Feelings...Feel..So, it's Think and Feel. I need to think harder and feel deeper..

After I finally switched on my bimbo brain.. I start to understand the game and start making my partnership, only after Round 5 ya people. Feels like such a fool. Halfway through, then baru tau how to play.. haiiyah.. Since I already know who has what on their back. I know who should I go to or when. And other people started to accept me as well. Started to accept me in their little partnership. It was fun again. I'm getting a few +ve marks here n there and less -ve amount than before. Maybe they too were bluurr like I was too.. hehehehe..

After finished with the 10 rounds, we gathered and had our reflection/ discussion moment. Of course, the objective is to relate the activity to the reality environment at work. Does it happen at work? what we have understand out of it? how we should address it? How that relate to personal leadership? and so on.. While we were all discussing and talking about it, deep inside I felt like as if the game had exposed me. When I failed to make a partnership with anybody in the 1st few rounds, I did took it to heart. At the end of each game, the facilitator will asked, "Who's alone?". When I hold my hand up, I did feel sad..really feel sad about it..Just coincidentally, in the real world I'm also partner-less, you see. SINGLE. No partner. Not just for a few rounds, as in this game.. but a few years!!! It hit me. I feel like I was getting a smack on my face. Ouch!! I was like.. " Not that just I'm single in real life.. I struggled to form partnership in a bloody game too???"

hahahah.. I can laugh at it now.. and think it was silly. What I felt was funny, I think.. But at that time, I can't help but wonder..maybe.. maybe not only maybe.. that's how I live my life... that's how I handled my relationship matters. That's why I'm still single. I've been playing "Reject Shop" all along. Like how I was in the 1st few rounds. As if all the guys I ever met and known have a sticker on their back. "Reject me if I'm too good looking"... "Reject me if I was your friend's ex-es"... "Reject me if your friend fancy me"... "Reject me if I'm not Muslim"... "Reject me if I'm younger than you"... "Reject me if my mom loves me"... "Reject me if I'm not funny"... "Reject me if I don't play football"... "Reject me if I can't sing"..."Reject me if I'm fairer than you".. and so on and so on.. you know? like...you have a certain criterias, some of which maybe silly and shallow even.. So, when you met anybody, know a little fact about him, then bam!!! you didn't think and feel further. Straight-away.. you gave the "no, i'm not interested-you're not what i'm looking for-you and I are not compatible" signal.

Again, what the facilitator said to all of us in the game keep repeating in my mind. I questioned myself..
I'm single because I do not think with my brain and I do not feel with my heart? hmm.. I have no such answer to that yet. hmm.. maybe I do but still in denial?? Who knows?? hahahah..I feel that, in the context of that activity, yes, having a partner is better than being alone regardless if both party met each others condition or not (i.e. you're getting better marks). However, in real life, I think, it's not necessarily better that for the sake of having a partner, you just accept whoever that came along your way. That's what I feel. But I may be wrong. This perception is what had made me where I am today, rite? As if, I'm not playing the "Reject Shop" the right way with my brain and heart and all..hehehe.... It's time for THINK and FEEL. Then..... CHANGE!!!

It's been awhile..

2009-10-28T01:19:00.000-07:00

It's been awhile...

So much things had happened this past few weeks that can be interesting to share and I would love to share.. but, sometimes, interesting story are meant to just be 'confidential' and 'biarlah rahsia'.. That is why, sometimes.... it's hard to keep a secret eh? It's hard not to share something to someone..especially when that something is worth to be shared.. whateverla eh...

I drove down to JB this Monday evening, visiting one of my dearest aunty. She had an operation to remove a fibroid a month ago. The operation was a success except that, she is currently struggling with the surgery suture. She already had her 1st suture removed and get it sutured back. But now, she had her 2nd suture removed and wait for the suitable condition for the 3rd suturing.. huhuhu.. Really pity her.. I just can't imagine how painful it can be..hope she can be strong, keep feeling positive and get well soon..

uwargh!!!!!

2009-10-02T04:07:00.000-07:00

Aaaaaaarrgh!!!!! Aaaarggghhhhhh!!!!!

p/s: Rase tension sgt hari nih... tapi x leh plak nak jerit2 x tentu pasal kat umah..

Salam Lebaran..Maaf Zahir dan Batin

2009-09-23T07:36:00.000-07:00

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri

Maaf Zahir dan Batin

I didn't reply SMS.. My bad..

2009-09-14T01:01:00.000-07:00

Will you cut off a friendship with a person just because the person did not reply your few SMS??

Removing the person's number in your mobile and your FB lists?

p/s: I don't what is in this man's mind.. who's in his late 30s.. who's not my boyfriend.. a man whom I didn't see as a potential boyfriend too (because of several obvious reasons).. whom I never had any argument(s) with.. suddenly acting all weird and pissed off? I wonder...

Sabar Separuh daripada Iman

2009-09-12T02:02:00.000-07:00

It doesn't matter whether you're fasting or not. Whether it's Ramadhan or not. People can still be as ignorant and selfish as they are. Sometimes, when mum's not cooking for buka puasa.. I will be her personal shopper.. It will be easier, if the food you want to buy is a ready made one. You just point here and there..and bham.. you got what you want.. But for foods like Roti John.. Kebab .. Nasi Goreng.. Claypot.. Sizzling Me.. etc.. you need to order and wait for it to be cooked.

Obviously, everybody is hungry. Everybody has the same time to buka puasa..but I just don't understand why people can be very impatient..and acted annoyingly like they're the only person who want the food to be ready on time before the azan.. If you already order.. pleasla be a little bit civilised.. and wait until your turn.. I really hate it, when some of them keep pushing about their order..

Mak Cik 1: "Mee Goreng akak dik" "Mee Goreng akak dik" at every chance they can..
Mak Cik 2: "Akak dah order lama dah nih"..It's like other people who's standing waiting there had not.. Kiter yg order dulu dari dia pun belum dapat.. lagi nak kecoh..
Mak Cik 3: "Jangan lupa dik, akak punya kueh tiaw ladna.."..
Mak Cik 4: " Akak punya Tom Yam dah masak belum?"..

I really pity the person at the counter.. If me, I would totally be confused..pening and pengsan terus.. There's people who is yet to order.. but then, there's people who keep asking about their order too..(like the mak ciks2 above).. huhuhu.. But, I don't just hate them being kecoh2 and pushy.. but I hate it when this mak ciks2 although came and order later than me, will eventually get their food earlier.. for just being annoying.. grrr...sabar.. sabar.. tarik nafas panjang2..

Conclusion: In this challenging world/life..do we need to be pushy and selfish to get what we want??

Salam Ramadhan...

2009-08-22T23:41:00.000-07:00

Salam Ramadhan buat semua.. Semoga Ramadhan kali ini membawa lebih rahmat dan keberkatan buat semua..

Buat Renungan dan panduan...

Fadhilat Menunaikan Solat Terawikh Sepanjang Ramadhan diriwayatkan oleh saiyidina Ali (r.a) daripada Rasulullah s.a.w., sebagai jawapan dari pertanyaan sahabat-sahabat nabi s.a.w. tentang fadhilat (kelebihan) sembahyang sunat terawikh pada bulan ramadhan:
malam 1:
keluar dosa-dosa orang mukmin pada malam pertama sepertimana ia baru dilahirkan, mendapat keampunan dari Allah.

malam 2:
diampunkan dosa dosa orang mukmin yang solat terawikh serta kedua ibubapanya (sekiranya mereka orang beriman).

malam 3:
berseru malaikat di bawah ‘Arasy supaya kami meneruskan solat terawikh terus menerus. `semoga Allah mengampunkan dosa engkau.’

malam 4:
memperolehi pahala ia sebagaimana pahala orang orang yang membaca kitab kitab taurat, zabur, injil dan al Quran.

malam 5:
Allah kurniakan baginya pahala orang-orang yang bersembahyang di masjidilharam, masjid madinah dan masjid aqsa.

malam 6:
Allah kurniakan pahala kepadanya pahala malaikat-malaikat yang tawaf di Baitul Ma’mur (70 ribu malaikat sekali tawaf), serta setiap batu-batu dan tanah-tanah mendoakan supaya Allah mengampunkan dosa-dosa orang yang mengerjakan sembahyang tarawih pada malam ini

malam 7:
seolah-olah ia mendapat bertemu dengan Nabi Musa serta menolong nNabi ‘Alaihissalam menentang musuh ketatnya fir’aun dan hamman.

malam 8:
Allah mengurniakan pahala orang sembahyang terawikh sepertimana yang telah dikurniakan kepada nabi Allah Ibrahim “Alaihissalam.

malam 9:
Allah kurniakan pahala dan dinaikkan mutu ibadat hambanya seperti nabi Muhammad s.a.w.

malam 10:
Allah subhanahuwata’ala mengurniakan kepadanya kebaikan didunia dan di akhirat.

malam 11:
keluar ia daripada dunia (mati) bersih daripada dosa seperti ia baru dilahirkan.

malam 12:
datang ia pada hari Qiamat dengan muka yang bercahaya (cahaya ibadatnya).

malam 13:
datang ia pada hari Qiamat dalam aman sentosa daripada tiap-tiap kejahatan dan keburukan.

malam 14:
datang malaikat menyaksikan ia bersembayang terawikh, serta Allah tiada menyesatkannya pada hari Qiamat.

malam 15:
semua malaikat yang menanggung ‘Arasy, Kursi, berselawat dan mendoakannya supaya Allah mengampunkannya.

malam 16:
Allah Subhanahuwata’ala tuliskan baginya terlepas daripada neraka dan dimasukkan ke dalam syurga.

malam 17:
Allah kurniakan orang yang berterawikh pahalanya pada malam ini sebanyak pahala para nabi.

malam 18:
seru malaikat: hai hamba Allah! sesungguhnya Allah telah redha kepada engkau dan ibubapa engkau (yang masih hidup atau mati).

malam 19:
Allah Subhanahuwata’ala tinggikan darjatnya didalam syurga firdaus.

malam 20:
Allah kurniakan kepadanya pahala sekian orang yang mati syahid dan orang-orang solihin.

malam 21:
Allah binakan sebuah istana dalam syurga daripada nur.

malam 22:datang ia pada hari Qiamat aman daripada tiap-tiap dukacita dan kerisauan (tidaklah dalam keadaan huru-hara di padang mahsyar).

malam 23:
Allah Subhanahuwata’ala binakan kepadanya sebuah bandar didlam syurga daripada nur.

malam 24:
Allah buka peluang 24 doa yang mustajab bagi orang berterawikh malam ini, (elok sekali berdoa ketika dalam sujud).

malam 25:
Allah Taala angkatkan daripadanya siksa kubur.

malam 26:
Allah kurniakan kepada orang berterawikh pahala pada malam ini seumpama 40 tahun beribadat.

malam 27:
Allah kurniakan orang berterawikh pada malam ini ketangkasan melintas atas titian sirotulmustaqim seperti kilat menyambar

malam 28:
Allah Subhanahuwata’ala kurniakan kepadanya 1000 darjat diakhirat

malam 29:
Allah Subhanahuwata’ala kurniakan kepadanya pahala 1000 kali haji yang mabrur.

malam 30:
Allah Subhanahuwata’ala beri penghormatan kepada orang berterawikh pada malam terakhir ini yang teristimewa sekali, lalu berfirman: “wahai hambaku: makanlah segala jenis buah-buahan yang engkau ingini hendak makan didalam syurga, dan mandilah engkau daripada air syurga yang bernama salsabila, serta minumlah air daripada telaga yang dikurniakan kepada Nabi Muhammad S.A.W. yang bernama ‘al-Kauthar’”
” Sila abaikan fadilat tersebut kerana wujud keraguan mengenai kesahihannya. Apapun, bak kata alim ulama. kita berbuat janganlah kerana pahala. wallahualam.

Rombongan Cik Kiah Menyunting Bunga..

2009-08-17T23:14:00.000-07:00

Sembang kakak-adik...

Ajim: Uwargh!!! Ajim dah takder gf dah..
Imah: Ha? *blurr kejap*
Ajim: Ajim dah ader tunang!!! hahaha
Imah: Cehhh.. :p

BENGANG

2009-08-13T19:19:00.000-07:00

Rasa bengang jer sepanjang minggu nih.. perasaan macam membuak-buak.. muak pun ader.. aarghh!!!

Memang tak faham dengan pe'el setengah2 orang nih.. One of my concept in life is.. kalau benda tuh kita boleh buat sendiri tanpa meyusahkan orang lain.. imah akan sedaya upaya cuba lakukannya sendiri tanpa mengharap orang lain.. Jadik memang tak paham kalau ada orang yang tak reti-reti adab dan malu.. suka nak menyusahkan dan menambah beban hidup orang..

*sigh*

TAGGED BY LOVE

2009-08-11T14:39:00.000-07:00

1 - Nama timangan anda?
dari kecik sampai besar..sumer orang panggil imah jer..takder nickname lain..

2 - Anda seorang yg...?
baik hati.. huahuahua... takkan nak mengaku jahat pulakkan..

3 - Insan yang teristimewa
Ishak b. Mas'od (arwah bapak) and Vico (arwah kucing kesayangan)..

4 - Lagu kesukaan?
Banyak giler!!! Antara yg paling minat.. My All (Mariah Carey), Tanpa Kekasihku (Agnes), I Don't Wanna Be (Gavin DeGraw), Kau Kekasihku, Usah Ragui (Siti Nurhaliza), Don't Speak (No Doubt), Coba, Mahakarya Cinta (Faizal Tahir)

5 - Makanan kesukaan?
Sumer makanan imah bedal jer.. kalau western, Italian foods (esp. lasagne).. kalau fastfood,KFC.. kalau deserts, choc cheese cake, cendol.. kalau local, aper2 yg mak masak.. hehehe..

6 - Sikap yang membuat anda stress?
stress boleh datang kalau imah berhadapan dengan org yang tak sabar.. 'kiasu'.. suker sibuk2 dengan benda2 yg remeh-temeh

7 - Warna kegemaran?
Turqoise

8 - Benda yang mesti ada dlm beg?
Beg tgn imah kecik jer.. jadik yg ader.. purse, henpon, kunci keta n rumah jer

9 - Kali terakhir anda menangis?
2nd Mar 09.. waktu baca Yaasin utk arwah bapak for his bedday..or any other day after that waktu tgk filem..hehehe..

10 - Tag untuk 6 rakan anda?
Takmo tagla.. kalau ader yg sudi menjawab.. silakan...

Who can paint a bedroom in 5hrs??

2009-08-10T16:42:00.000-07:00

Me!!!!

I paint our guest room which now turned to be my mum's room in 5hrs last night.. Alone, OK.. No assistance from anybody.. At the end, I did smell and look like a 'sakai'.. Who knows how a sakai looked eh? hehehe..

This is one of my personal achievement. Definitely can put into my CV. Maner tau boleh amik upah cat bilik org plak.. hahahah..

Visiting Opah

2009-08-10T10:16:00.000-07:00

I went to visit Opah at Bukit Beruntung on Saturday. She's not feeling well and can't get up/walk. Nothing so serious since she only had a mild fever.. but for a person in her mid 80s, anything should be taken seriously.. It's not the first time, she's at this kind of condition, and it's not the first time I help to take care of her. But this time, it was 1 of my first time experience handling elderly 'diapers business'. I did not do it alone obviously, because I have my mum's to assist. On the night, I just helped changing the diaper, clean her up and put the fresh one. The next day, Opah keep complaining about her not been 'buang air besar' for ages. My aunty said that they have a lubricant that can be put at the related area to ease the business. I was then asked to put that lubricant into the 'related area'. It was quite a scary moment for me.. huhuhu.. However, the after 'buang air besar' business was more scarier.. Once we, took off the diaper, only God knows how I felt and smell. Not only I need to tahan the smell, I have to try not to making the 'geli' or 'disgusted' face too in front of Opah.. I always wonder, why some people can be reluctant/geli to take care of their own old/sick parents. Now, I can understand why.. It's not very easy for some, I guess.

The experience really taught me.. and hope I can compliment what my mom did for Opah and have a daughter like me to assist.. hehehe.. Will baby Ecah up for the challenge??? hahahah

What a week!!!

2009-08-02T23:47:00.000-07:00

Last week..I took 4-days leave (Tues-Fri) to finish off my vacation balance for 2008/2009 period. This holiday was very much anticipated. So much things I wanna do.. and I do need rest and beauty sleeps.. Sekali, terkena flu plak.. huhuhu..I blame Jalan TAR and Jalan Masjid India for bringing the virus.. As most of you know, I didn't really get out much these days kan.. Sekali.. terus2 keluar gi tempat yg sesak dan penuh 'udara segar' macam tuh.. maner taknya terus diserang oleh mcm2 jenis virus.. huhuhu..

What was my business there? hmm.. very important business indeed.. My bro and his soon-to-be wife and I went there to buy stuffs for 'majlis merisik'.. We all very satisfied with our quest at the end of the day.. coz we managed to buy all the stuffs we want.. kain2 baju nikah.. samping..songkok and cincin risik.. Alhamdullillah..

So, memang x syokla kalau your holiday jadi your sick-days.. Plus, imah risau jugak kalau-kalau terkena H1N1 plak.. bila scan2..my demam was suam-suam suku jer.. so terlepasla jadik suspek penghidap.. Alhamdulillah lagik..

Then, come Thursday.. my birthday!!! Since, I didn't celebrate birthday.. so birthday or not birthday is pretty much the same to me.. Apart of feeling old.. hahahah.. imah just felt grateful that imah is still breathing.. still dilimpahkan dengan kenikmatan hidup dan rezeki yang secukupnya.. and blessed with wonderful family and friends.. Alhamdulillah..

27 adalah my target age to get married.. So, I have another 12 months to still achieve my target.. hahahah.. I don't remember when I set this target and why I need to do so. But back then, I guess, at 27 years of age I would be ready to be someone's wife and I would probably meet my 'jodoh' already.. But, who am I to set things for myself eh?

My weekends packed with schedules.. I had UMNO Setiawangsa meeting in the morning at Hotel Nikko.. wakil Puteri UMNO cawangan.. siap kena pakai baju uniform sekolah dgn kain pink tu lagik.. glamer2 pegi Hotel Nikko tapi kena pakai uniform plak.. huhuhu..nothing much in the meeting.. ate breakfast then sit to hear Ketua Pemuda, Wanita and Puteri berucap.. Pretty much, most of them were talking about their big lost in the last elections.. the what.. why.. and action plan.. takdela fokus sgtkan dengar speech2 nih.. and I wonder how about the other Puteri ? Do they really listen to the speech dengan khusyuknya? Or they just gossiping.. ask about where each other get their baju from? where they get the selendang from.. how they do their hair n stuffs? If most of the ahli muda are in fact like me.. it makes me wonder, apakah nasib UMNO in the future? apakah nasib bangsa Melayu in the future? what kind of Melayu are we in the future?

Later in the evening, I went to The Gardens Midvalley for an exciting karaoke invitations.. It was supposed to starts at 6pm.. but I only move from the house 10 mins before 6.. imah budget2 ptg Sabtu slalunya jalan tak jam dah.. I think I can reach there within 30 mins.. Obviously, I forgot about the 'perhimpunan' plan.. I have 2 route options.. Option 1..take Duke until Mont Kiara then use Kerinchi Link or Option 2..the usual route.. Jalan Tun Razak-L'raya Mahameru-Jalan Bangsar.. So, when I drove out, I decided to take Option 2.. (jln yg x kena byr tol la).. but, when I just got to Jalan Tun Razak from Jalan Semarak.. the cars are already bumper-to-bumper and moving slowly.. So, I took the exit at Bulatan Pahang.. and drive thru Bandar Baru Sentul to cut to Jalan Mahameru thru Sentul Link, coz I thought the traffic is only slow at PWTC flyover.. but when I reached L'raya Mahameru.. the traffic is even worst.. more than 30 mins later, I reached Tasik Perdana exit.. and I saw the road was blocked by the police.. I wonder what was happening at Dataran Merdeka.. I don't think we're having any celebration concert but then the 'perhimpunan' thingy came into my mind.. big sigh..

Since cars were hardly moving, I decided to exit at Jalan Duta and drive thru Sprint to get to Kerinchi Link.. I stucked at the exit as well.. but since MidValley City exit is just a few metres away.. it didn't took me long to get to the destinantion.. My fuel tank pun dah start blinking.. Lucky, I managed to get off from the traffic sooner.. if my car suddenly kering and mati tgh2 jam tuh.. fuh.. x taula mcm maner nak handle.. However, the night ended in a fun and memorable moments.. Really happy that I was lucky enough to have the opportunity to join..Mmg tidur dgn mimpi2 yg indah indeed.. :D

My last day of the week filled with 2 wedding events and 1 birthday party.. I'm totally out of baju kurong/kebaya to wear for a wedding dah.. I'm at the state that i don't care if people see me wear the same baju twice in 2/3 different ocassions.. huhuhu.. I desperately want to learn how to potong kain so I can sew my own baju kurong.. Tgh2 pokai nih.. I can't afford to tempah berpasang2 baju kurong.. huhuhu.. nak beli yg ready-made pun raser ralat jer.. nak yg cantik2 and kain tg ader kualiti sikit gerenti mahal giler.. anything I touched mesti harga rm200++.. tak mampu la!!!! kang beli yg rm50 tuh.. gerenti berlambak org pakai baju kain yg sama.. hahahah.. dahla x berduit.. berkira pulak tu kan?

That evening, first time la imah bawak mak and baby Ecah (baby yg kami dok jaga tu la) keluar jalan2.. So, yesterday was baby Ecah 1st birthday party.. wah.. Ecah mmg glamer la that evening.. menjadi rebutan mama2 angels.. hahaha.. seronokla baby tuh didodoi2 oleh mama2 yg comel dan gebu2.. siap terus terlena.. hahahah.. dapat merasa didukung oleh artis lagik.. 'mama' baby Ecah pun tak didukung dek artis.. tapi baby Ecah pulak yg dapat.. cisss.. hehehe..penat didukung2.. balik rumah baby terus jer tido dgn nyenyaknya.. biler dier merengek2, imah try jugak nak dodoi2kan dier.. tapi sekrg dier dah tak selesa dgn tangan 'tilam nipis' imah.. huhuhu.. yela.. dah merasa tilam VONO.. hahahah..

BENCINTA...

2009-07-24T10:04:00.000-07:00

There's one kind creature on earth that I scared the most.. BABY!!!! especially the little ones.. OK.. all babies are little..so.. I mean.. newborn babies.. I think, even babies don't really like me that much.. coz everytime people force me to carry any babies.. they will start cringing..n then.. uweekk!!!! screaming!! At one point, I do prefer cats than babies.. coz cats are nicer.. and more 'manja'.. to me.. hehehe

And recently, we have a baby living in our house.. The detailed story of whose the baby and how she (the baby is a she) got to my house, I think I want it to just be 'Biarlah Rahsia'.. although there's a funny story when I went to one of my aunty's house last weekends where my aunty's bibik mistakenly thought the baby was mine.. hahahah.. she was like so shocked (and amazed at the same time) when she looked at me with the baby. She's like rubbing2 my tummy.. and saying "nggak tauk pun mengandung?? nampak kempis saja perutnya".. She was so confused..So I add in more 'perisa' to her la..saying that.."Saya pun tak tau macam mana baby nih boleh keluar..tak mengandung pun..tiba2 jer dia terkeluar..magic!!! ini baby instant bik".. hahahah.. me just being evil..

Having her in the house and helping my mum taking care of her.. makes me realise that raising a baby, i.e. a child is like the most wonderful things in life.. She's not even my own child.. but I just adore her to bits and enjoying every seconds of 'motherhood'. It's all started as if, I'm helping out my mum.. coz I know looking after a baby is not an easy tasks.. and my mum is not really like herself 25 years back when she last took care of a baby.. So, whenever, my mum need to do something (pray..go to toilet.. mandi..rehat.. whatever), I will help to look after the baby for awhile.. I'm just lucky that, I can work from home. So at the mean time, I can just be around the house and gives the extra hands when needed.. Walaupun.. my dedication to IBM during the day is still the No. 1 priority la kan.. hehehe.. kang performance menurun.. tak dapat bonus and increment plak.. huhuhu..

After almost 2 months.. I can say that, I'm not scared with babies anymore.. Everytime, I look at the baby, my heart keeps telling me that I'm ready to have a child of my own.. I think I will be able to handle it, whenever the time come.. I feel like I want to be a mother.. and I think I'm ready to be one.. For now.. let me just having fun being the 'experimental mother' to Nur Aishah Zulaika..

p/s: I'm off to feed my other 9 'childrens' plak.. hehehe..

Photoshop??

2009-07-21T20:06:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was a fun day.. one. I dare to 'disappear' from work for a half day.. two. experienced doing 'photoshop'.. belajar meng-edit gambar kerr???? huhuhu.. three. had an almost non-stop laughs.. from kisah kakak tercekik.. to telatah 'diva' yg mencuit hati.. to kisah melantak kuih.. to kisah butang baju terbukak.. all sorts of comedic moments that you can think of..four. yummy foods to eat!!!

Investigation Period Completed...

2009-07-17T01:30:00.000-07:00

It's been awhile yeah.. It's not that I'm just busy with works and fully occupied at home.. I actually do not have much interesting story to share and write in here.. Sometimes, I would do copy and paste entry.. but since I'm not reading much of anything.. I can't do that as well.. huhuhu..

I'm just tired.. bored and feeling sleepy.. Lucky it's Friday.. at least I can think of having the possibility of waking up late tomorrow morning and lazying on my bed.. if and only if I can actually really really do that.. but no harm in wishing and hoping and wondering and berangan-ing rite? hahaha..

Happy Weekend Everyone!!!

Pengemis Import...

2009-06-24T22:35:00.000-07:00

Quoted from an e-mail forwarded to me recently... terpanggil pulak untuk berkongsi dengan semua.. Layan...

Saya lama mengetahui kegiatan terbabit. Malangnya apabila disiarkan di TV, pelbagai pihak marah dan mengutuk.

"Apahal engkau kacau orang susah tu? Tak ada kerja lain?", "Kau nak masuk neraka ke?", "Kalau kau susah, padan muka!"

Antara respon saya terima melalui emel dan SMS. Apapun saya percaya banyak pihak menangguk di air keruh. Mereka tahu, majoriti rakyat Malaysia pemurah. Tanpa usul periksa mereka menyumbang.

Biar saya kongsikan satu daripada pengalaman saya lalui. Lelaki warga Thailand, 33 tahun, saya temui sewaktu menjalankan tinjauan berhubung kegiatan pengemis di Pasar Malam Kelana Jaya, Petaling Jaya, Selangor bulan Ramadan lalu. Lelaki itu cacat, tiada sebelah kaki. Katanya, kaki putus akibat terkena jerangkap samar lama dulu. Hairan, semasa saya mendekatinya, dia melarikan diri secara mengesut ke tempat parkir kereta. Mungkin dia mengenali saya dan kerjaya. Melalui temubual, dia mengaku meraih pendapatan antara RM100 dan RM150 sehari hasil mengemis. Januari lalu, saya ke Pasar Malam Kota Damansara dan kemudian terserempak 3 remaja Myanmar dianggarkan berusia antara 10 dan 12 tahun, cacat kaki dan tangan. Saya hampiri dan bertanya kepada mereka ...

"Siapa bawa kamu ke sini?"

Mereka diam dan berpura-pura bisu. Namun setelah beberapa kali didesak, mereka menunjukkan 'ayah' mereka. Terkejut, 'ayah' itu lelaki sama saya temui di Kelana Jaya. Cuma kali itu, berbeza. Dia berdiri sambil bercekak pinggang, bagai taukeh lagaknya. Tanpa disedari saya menghampiri lelaki itu. Dia terkejut melihat saya, pucat wajah tanpa darah.

"Macam mana kamu boleh bawa budak-budak tu mengemis?," soal saya.

Dia gugup. Ingin saya menampar mukanya, geram. Dia sanggup mengeksploitasi kanak-kanak terbabit untuk mengaut keuntungan. Saya katakan kepadanya ...

"Sekali lagi aku nampak muka engkau, kau mesti menyesal se umur hidup"

Dia dan kanak-kanak terbabit pantas menghilangkan diri. Sedar tidak atau, ramai antara kita diperbodohkan pengemis warga asing, hadir di negara ini hanya mencari jalan pintas mengaut keuntungan. Layari blog saya, mazidulakmal.blogspot.com. Banyak kisah benar lain saya kongsikan.

Terima kasih.
( Sila sebarkan emel ini )
Mazidul Akmal Sidik

Perbualan Hujung Minggu

2009-06-15T23:14:00.000-07:00

Mak cik 1: Oh, ni imah, anak K. Aishah tu yer?
Mak imah: *mengangguk* (bukannyer dier ader anak pompuan lain pun)
Mak cik 1: Lama dah balik UK?
Imah: Lama dah.. 3 tahun jugakla..
Mak cik 1: Kerja kat mane sekarang?
Imah: Kat IBM
Mak Cik 1: Ha, biler lagi? (merujuk kepada, bila kami nak buat kenduri pulak)
Imah: *senyum dan mendiamkan diri*
Mak imah: Tak lama lagi.. tapi bukan yang inila.. anak yang lagi satu tuh..
Mak cik 1: Yang ini bila pulak?
Imah: *still senyum dan mendiamkan diri*
Mak imah: Yang ni lambat lagi kot.. Yang ni lembap sikitla.. hehehehe..

Bayangkanlah.. berapa kali perbualan di atas terpaksa di ulang-ulang bila jumpa mak cik2 (or auntie2) kat kenduri..

p/s: Juga mendapat cadangan daripada mak cik2 (yg anak mereka juga adalah "segolongan" dengan imah).. untuk menganjurkan majlis mandi bunga pulak..huhuhu..

Aik?? Peliknya...

2009-06-10T20:27:00.000-07:00

These past few days and weeks.. imah raser pelik sangat.. sebab imah asyik di datangi oleh lelaki-lelaki which was close to my heart before.. Diorg bukanlah my special boifren ke aper (yg betul2 jadik boifren takdela plak muncul).. but I had special feelings for them.. those time I'm not ready to be anybody's girlfriend or I much prefer we both berkawan biasa jer.. So, I did not try to convert the feeling of interests into something else..

Jangan suspen2 yer.. mereka2 nih bukanlah tiba-tiba datang muncul depan mata imah.. tapi muncul dalam mimpi jer.. hahahah.. yg peliknya, ader yg siap 2 malam berturut2 keluar dalam mimpi.. <menggeleng-geleng kepala>.. lagi pelik, diorg nih bukanlah lelaki2 yang imah selalu jumpa.. memang dah lama tak jumpa.. ader yg dah tak jumpa hampir 10thn dulu.. bercakap2 lagila takder.. kire mmg dah tahap lost contact..

Nak menambah pelik lagi.. tak cukup muncul dalam mimpi, ader beberapa muncul dalam bentuk virtual.. tiba-tiba kasik SMS.. tiba-tiba YM.. tiba-tiba muncul dalam frenster/ FB/ e-mail.. memang terasa pelik sangat.. apsal tiba-tiba jer jadik kurang sombong ngan imah? hahahah..

p/s: Soalan kuiz: berapa perkataan pelik yg ader dlm kenyataan di atas?

5 years...

2009-06-05T01:40:00.000-07:00

What was I 5 years ago on this date?

I was a student.. doing my degree.. living in the lovely Yarrow flat with my fellow nice n hot Yarrow girls.. hahaha.. The date was during my final exam period.. I can't wait to get the 3-years torture to be over.. and feeling nervous at the same time coz I'm scared I would fail.. Getting an F for a subject was so easy back then.. hehehe..

I also.. lost my favourite member of my family on this date, 5 years ago.. The backbone and most integral part of the family.. It was the moment of change in my life, my self, and my family.. A lot of things had/ need to be changed from this date..

Time flies ha.. tick tock.. tick tock.. it's been 5 years already.. Really really missed him and missed having a father figure in my life.. huhuhu..

Al- Fatihah buat Allaryarham Ishak b. Mas'od.. Semoga dirimu diletakkan di kalangan orang-orang yang beriman.. Amin.

Kau kata aku bodoh.. Ada aku kesah?

2009-06-02T19:25:00.000-07:00

Pagi-pagi lagi dah ader drama hari nih.. Got an incident with a so-so pak cik kat depan entrance OU Dataran Car Park.. I don't think I can blame him 100%-ly of his rudeness, tapi still nak geram gak.. hahahah..

I don't know the definition of 'melanggar' and 'di langgar' that much. But from what had happenned, I was in fact 'di langgar' and bukan 'melanggar'. The funny thing is, jalan tuh punyala sunyi and tak ada kereta sangat pun.. tapi boleh ader 'accident' pulak.. huhuhu.. When I made my decision to turn right, I was so sure no car at the opposite road. I don't know where this motorcycle came (I guess this is where I was wrong and careless) from but sure as hell it should be very far because if it's soo near, I would 'melanggar' him on my front bumper or 'dilanggar' on any front/middle car body part. Just when, I finished made my turn.. gedebum!!! ader benda langgar my back-bumper. So I was 'dilanggar', OK.. hahahah.. my argument kalau nak defend diri kat court..hehehe..

Kita pun berentila kan.. nak tengok.. kot mati ker aper.. Alhamdulillah, he and the motorcycle OK. So, imah polite2 cakapla.. "I'm sorry, are u OK?". He's reply.. dalam nada yg marah n bengang..."I'm Sorry?!! OK?!! Bodoh!!! Tak nampak ker? Pekak ker? Org dah hon lama!!!".. (Banyak kali jugak perkaataan BODOH tu keluar dari mulut pak cik tuh.. tapi x sempat nak kira).. Memang rasa bersalah sangat time tuh.. 1st memang imah tak perasan the motor.. ntah dari ceruk maner datangnyer.. tengok jalan clear jer tadi.. 2nd memang tak dengar hon sebab music in the car was quite loud..

I was trying to be calm and just apologizing.. I guess that's the only thing I can do at the moment.. Bukannya boleh rewind aper yg terjadik pun.. Tapi sebab.. dier terus2 attack.. and being damn rude.. imah pun naik syeh jugakla.. and marah balik kat pak cik tuh.. "Saper yang langgar saper nih.. Tadi jalan saya tengok kosong jer.. saya lintasla.. Tak reti2 nak slow down ker kalau dah nampak dari jauh kereta melintas?..Maner plak kereta boleh berenti tengah2 jalan.. Kalau dah tau keta takder nak berenti pandai2la slowdown.. saper yg bodoh sekarang nih?.. Org dah mintak maaf.. kalau nak marah jugak pegi blahla.. bukannyer cedera pun.. mentang2 org pompuan.. sajer jer nak cari kecoh" ..huhuhu.. bertikam lidah la kami seketika.. imah pun tak berapa nak ingat aper yg imah dok merepek2 ngan pak cik tuh.. huhuhu

Memang rasa bersalah.. tapi mmg takleh pakai kalau org x tentu pasal being rude.. mmg rasa panas satu badan.. but I understand.. maybe dier pun terkejut.. hampir nak kena langgar dgn keta tuh.. Ntah2 dier dah lambat nak gi ofis ke aper.. Imah cuma bersyukur sangat2 sebab tak terlanggar dia sampai tergolek2 and membuatkan anybody tercedera.. Memang horrorla kalau yang sebaliknya terjadi..

Smarter Planet Series: Shaping tomorrow's leaders

2009-06-02T01:25:00.000-07:00

"With more than US$4 trillion in global stimulus funding on the table, building smarter infrastructure is the best path to creating jobs, stimulating growth and driving innovation in the 21st century. The best news of all is that investing in innovation will cost less and yield faster results than investing in renovation...We need our people to infuse intelligence into the way the world actually works."
- Ou Shian Waei, CGM, IBM Malaysia

[Read about how we shape tomorrow's leaders in The Edge]

Courtesy of Comms, IBM Malaysia

Flat tummy in 10 weeks?

2009-05-28T02:07:00.000-07:00

Illustration only: Bukan perut sebenar yer...

I've always been a potato couch person rather than a regular gym visitor person. I rather eat less to maintan my weight and body shape. If I put on a bit of weight and looked chubby-er than usual.. I'll be just fine. Recent self-realisation strikes me that (antara bukti2nya, lari 200m pun dah pancit, main futsal tak sampai 5 min dah semput, bukak tutup jam pun tak kuat..huhuhu) , exercise is not just about building body shape. I need to workout to increase my body strength and energy which I'm lacking now.

My resolution?... I'm visiting the gym again!! I know that, to do so (going to the gym) regularly is a really really tough task. Even, the possibility of 'cuci mata' looking at hot guys workout in the gym can't really inject my spirit (maybe I know that most of them are gays kot..hehehe). But I will try my best.. huhuhu.. SEMANGAT!!! (bak kater Bintang dlm citer Intan tuh)

p/s: After 10 weeks.. dapat jadik cam 'After' tu ker?

Terima Kasih - atas kehadiran dan doa restu

2009-05-24T08:24:00.000-07:00

Inilah hasil kerja hujung minggu imah for the past 3 weekends (yang kononya boleh disiapkan dalam 5 hari nih). Seronok jugak buat benda alah nih, although imah akan cuba sedaya upaya utk tak membuat benda remeh temeh nih for my own wedding.. hahaha.. jauh lagi perjalanan my own wedding tuh.. aper2 pun, just got a confirmed news recently that my own family wedding is coming soon this year!!!! Siapakah gerangan yang akan berkawin itu? Ajim? ataupun Mak Imah? ataupun one of the cats? huhuhu..wat saspen jer...

Smarter Planet Series: Extract oil and gas efficiently

2009-05-20T23:31:00.000-07:00

We all feel the impact of higher oil prices. The average Malaysian feels the effect when he orders his favourite meal at the mamak stall because an increase in oil prices translates to an increase of everything else in the supply chain. As we move towards a renewable future, we need to shape our hydrocarbon present in ways that are more efficient, affordable and protective of the environment.
- Ou Shian Waei, CGM, IBM Malaysia

[Read about how we make oil and gas smarter in The Edge]

Courtesy of Comms, IBM Malaysia

Alamak!

2009-05-18T03:08:00.000-07:00

Alamak! Kena 'Touch n Go' oleh Angah plak.. huhuhu.. Angah!! Tak nak jawab boleh tak?!!! tapi stiker tuh cam comel..hehehehe

1. Copy badge "2008 Cute Blogger Award" di atas untuk diletakkan di blog anda - OK dah.
2. Link/ceritakan kembali siapa yang memberikan award ini kepada anda
Angah kusayang!!! Saper Angah ni ek? Yg penting bukan kakak No.2 imah.. hehehe.. Salah seorang kakak RizAngels yg imah kenal waktu fanatik ngan AF6 dulu.. 1st time jumpa waktu kat Melaka.. kami bukan setakat dijodohkan duduk se-apartment dan sebilik..tapi juga sekatil..wahh!!!panas..panas..panas..

Seorang yang caring.. kelakar tahap membasahkan gusi.. pendengar yg baik-citerla aper pun masalah kat dier, gerenti dia dengar.. kreatif- imah sangat suka membaca nukilan2 jiwang nyer yg sungguh menusuk kalbu..seorg 'mesin informasi bergerak'..hahaha..kira boleh 'scroll' macam2 info dari angah nih especially filem2 terbaru di pasaran..friendly.. fun.. the only person yg imah kenal boleh tepek ENO kat mate..huahuahua.. mmg best sgt dapat berkenalan dengan angah..

3. Setiap blogger mesti menyatakan 10 fakta/hobi diri sendiri sebelum memilih penerima award seterusnya.. (anda di-tag!)
- Sangat suka kucing.. Kucing tepi jalan pun imah boleh layan.. huhuhu
- Minat muzik and menyanyi.. paling suka..menyanyi dalam keta.. huahuahua..
- Tak boleh hidup tanpa TV.. punca informasi and hiburan saya..
- Like to keep things simple and not complicated.. If membuat sesuatu menjadikan hidup/keadaan lebih complicated.. imah akan choose untuk tidak melakukannya..
- Most first impression of people about me is that imah sombong or/and diorg takut/segan ngan imah. Tak taula kenapa yer..
- Seorang yg berdarah gemuruh..hehehe.. kalau kena buat presentation or buat anything depan org ramai..otomatik terus menggeletar satu badan..hahaha..
- Kali terakhir bercinta adalah tahun 2002..wah!!! 6-7 tahun gak tak mencintai dan dicintai..hati yg penuh kegersangan nih.. (terasa poyo sekejap ngan statemen last tuh..hehehe)
- Tak suka org cakap tak serupa bikin.. mmg sgt tak suka.. "cakap jer lebih, kalau x buat tak gunala!!!"
- Went to 9 different schools dari Darjah 1 - Form5 (SRK Padang Tembak, SRK Lembah Keramat, SRK Taman Melawati 1, SRK Kem Terendak, SRK Kelana Jaya 2, SRK Taman Permata, SMK Lembak Keramat, SMK Batu Lintang, SM Sains Kuching)
- Tak tahan sejuk..especially air-cond..

p/s: phew...tamat jugak.. susah jugak nak listkan 10 fakta nih..huhuhu

4. Anda perlu memilih 6 penerima award seterusnya dan menyatakan nama mereka di blog anda.Akhirnye dah menghampiri ke garisan penamat... sapa ekkk yang layak. Bukan senang nak bagi penamaan calon-calon nih sbb semua yang dikenali hebat-hebat belaka.
Gerenti grup RizAngels telah 'TnG'..huhuhu.. So calon-calon saya adalah, in no particular order..
1. Sayayangayu aka Ayu
2. Bukan Loser aka Mizzy
3. Asrul
4. Anything is Possible aka Dikla
5. The never Ending Story aka Mama Anem
6. Dunia Oren, bukan nama sebenar

"Serlahkan Transformasi Diri Anda"..Katanya..

2009-05-17T19:11:00.001-07:00

Dah abis dah AF7.. Raser sekejap jer 10 minggu.. Imah still mengikuti lagi perkembangan rancangan ini, walaupun dah kurang fanatik sikit kalau nak banding waktu musim2 AF yg awal2 dulu (AF1-AF3). hehehe.. Kalau dulu TV @15 tuh bukak 24-7.. konsert, diari tgk ulang2, mcm dah takder rancangan lain.. pastu siap tgk kat internet lagi for extended version.. tapi sekarang both imah and mak dah berubah..hahahah..

Seperti musim2 dahulu.. konsert akhir adalah tali pengukur pencapaian budak2 AF nih..oops, tahun nih..ader mak budak sekali.. hehehe..Adakah mereka berjaya menyerlahkan transformasi diri mereka? Siapa yang paling dekat memenuhi kriteria tag-line 'transformasi' AF tahun nih? Kalau nak compare persembahan konsert2 akhir musim2 lalu, imah rasa konsert tahun nih a bit suramla (walaupun rata2 kata meriah, but I don't feel like it was..huhuhu). Tak berapa ke-ba-bom..and tak berapa tertarik-menarik-the bom!!!.. Mungkin sebab pemilihan lagu.. or sebab diorang nervous-1st time wat show kat stadium besar.. or pelajar tak berapa serasi dengan lagu baru lagi.. whatever it was..diorg dah buat sedaya upayala kan.. (I thought konsert ke-9 diorg lagi best dan menghiburkan).

Akhir konsert..Hafiz telah dinobatkan sebagai juara AF7 tahun nih. Layak ker? Berdasarkan bakat dan keupayaan dier every week.. He is the deserving winner. No doubt about it. If he's given a chance to have a more impactful song to sing, (cam lagu I believe I can fly tuh), mungkin malam tuh akan jadi lebih magical buat Hafiz.. Walaupun disindir Adlin, "vokal mantap jer tak cukup dik".. but I guess, he should present his strength over anything else first right? Kalau dengan vokal dah boleh memukau penonton.. buat aper nak susah payah tergolek2 , slide sini and sana and melompat2 atas pentas? Aper2 pun, imah tidak menidakkan keperluan creativity and arts in performance. Memang best kalau persembahan vokal yg bagus diiringi oleh memorable stage performance.

However..utk pilihan peribadi Transformasi AF7, imah tujukan buat adik ...Akim!!! It's not because imah dah minat dier from 1st konsert or bukan sbb dier org Johor k but he did lift up to the transformation tagline- kire ader peningkatan yang ketara from Week 1 till final. Utk final, he did a not bad 1st attempt utk persembahan lagu baru sendiri.. and a great performance for Bencinta (bak kater Edri Hashim.. penuh dgn aura..sampai terpercik2..hehehe). Suka ngan konsep persembahan tuh.. but vocally takleh lawan Faizal Tahir la n still got rooms for more improvements.. maybe tenaga dah terabis kat tarik2 tangan tuh kot, sampai dah takder daya nak menjerit.. huhuhu.. utk tahap beginner.. it was goodla..I don't think I can compare bdk sethn jagung ngan Faizal Tahirkan.. hehehe..

Aper2 pun Good Luckla untuk mereka.. Hope that, apart of singing, diorang tak lupa untuk terus belajar dan mempertingkatkan diri..

p/s: banyak betul rancangan realiti pertandingan nyanyi nih.. and ramai betul yang nak jadi penyanyi..huhuhu..

Smarter Planet Series: Diagnosis for a smarter nation

2009-05-13T22:07:00.000-07:00

"Health is an important asset in the development of human capital in any nation. A healthy workforce is fundamental to the contribution of a well-functioning economy. Smarter healthcare is instrumented, so our health systems can automatically capture accurate, real-time information...improving and consolidating health information management and facilitating evidence-based decision-making."

.- Ou Shian Waei, CGM, IBM Malaysia

[Read about how IBM makes healthcare smarter in The Edge]

Courtesy of Comms, IBM Malaysia

A Song for Mama

2009-05-11T01:22:00.000-07:00

Walaupun dah ketinggalan sikit.. Tapi imah nak tepek jugak lagu nih.. Happy Mother's day to all moms!!!

Mama..u're the queen of my heart!!! and I will always love you..(except biler time kena marah)..hehehe..

Saya Sebagai Seorang Pekerja Pt3 - Home Sweet Home

2009-05-10T20:43:00.000-07:00

I was back for good in Feb 2006. Straight away, I start my work application. Thru postal, hand-in, Jobstreet.Com, Career Fair, etc. At first, I still pursue actuarial type of work or at least in insurance companies. Got a couple of interviews. But, since I'm a bit 'dungu' in insurance terms and knowledge, I failed each time..huhuhu..

1 month past. I was still unemployed. I don't think being unemployed for a month stressed me out that much, but again, the needs of income came in a way of patience. Since my dad passed away, we (the family) need to stand in our own feet. My brother had already working and get his own source of living. My mother obviously has her own income from my father's pension which actually enough for me, her and the family stuffs (bills, foods and household stuffs). But, to a certain extendla rite?.. I can't expect my mom to buy me a new sandal.. I can't expect my mum to buy me new shirts for interviews.. I can't expect my mum to still give me RM50 everytime I want to go out with friends for movies n stuffs..This little things made me need my own income very much.

From previous experiences in UK, employment agency is the best source for fast-track employment. I follow my brother's advice 1 day, to register at Kelly Services. On the day itself, I was recommended to a job at a Healthcare Centre (the company: KLIC) as an Admin Assistant. I was told that, the owner is an expat, so I'll be perfect for the job. OK, whateverla. I just want a job. tak kisahlah, working for a mat salleh ker aper. Looking at the manager's name(Dr. Nick Boden), the fisrt image came to mind was an old-white hair-beardy-nerd looking mat salleh doctor.. hahahah.. (Dr Nick was not even close to my imagination..hehehe..he's much good looking, at least at that time la..hehehe)

I was very nervous on my first day. The job is like the usual admin job - more receptionist-admin tasks more or less. Taking phone calls, note petient's appoitnments, welcomed patients, handling payments and do daily reports. While working at the centre, I still continue on my quest for permanent employment. I later got a job offer as an Admin Executives in a logistic company at KL Sentral and with that I hand-in my resignation at the centre. However, my services are still needed at the centre (kononyela...) when then, Dr Nick counter an offer for me to work as a permanent staffs there. For my own-self development, he offers that I handle the administration and the management of the centre- in addition to my usual receptionist-admin tasks that I used to do before. Since I like to work there, I chose to stay. Plus, both offers job descriptions that are pretty much be the same, except if I stay, I don't have to move to new office and much closer to home. hehehehe..

I worked there for 1+ years. It's not a big, well-known company. But, I learned a lot while working at the centre. What I did was like a bit of everything. I was the receptionist.. I was the customer service.. I was the sales person.. I was the cashier.. I was the admin ops.. I was the credit control admin.. I was the 'accountant'.. I joined them doing marketing, bukak booth bagai..even to the part siram pokok bunga pun I'll do. I put my passion to the job and the centre. I like what they do. I love the people in the centre and the chiropractic organisation family. I like meeting the people who came for treatment. Meeting the people was one of the great experience. The good and bad. The level of people who came there. From a CEO of a company.. to a producer.. to a minister.. a governor..to a sports-person.. executives.. expats.. I met them all. To have a chance of having conversations with this kind of people that I would rarely have an opportunity of in my real life was just mind blowing. Although, sometimes, some customer will give you a 2nd grade treatment because you are behind a receptionist desk and looked down on you, it's just makes me stronger and learned more about life and people. I have to accept the fact that, not everybody will treat you nice.. They are bitches and bastrads out there and I need to experience it and see it with my own eyes.

I guess after a while.. I want to move on. No direspect to the company. It gave me the best first job experiences ever but I want to explore more and experience new challenges. My aim will be to work for an MNC company. Again, I went to recruitment agency for assistance and Manpower was the one who introduced me to IBM. Honestly, I dont know much about IT industry and IBM brand. Before the interview was the first time I know about what IBM do. It offers diverse opportunities from sales, marketing, finance and consulting positions which attracts me the most. The position I was recommended was Marketing Operations Specialist. At that time, the thing I had in my mind was on the possible opportunities for me to go for a Marketing Intelligence or Business Consulting position in future (my so-called 'dream job'). All I need is to break in into the company. Tak kisahlah under what position and I did, as a contract staff for a year. After my contract expires, I was lucky enough that the manager, had believe in me and offers me a Regular/permanent position in IBM as a Marketing Operations Specialist as well but now handling ASEAN/AP region. On 1st Aug 2008, I was finally a true IBMer and still are till present.

What I do as a Marketing Operations Specialist then? hmm.. Marketing Operations is about performance, financial management, strategic planning, marketing resource, and skills assessment and management.
What most of us do are:
1. Defining and managing systems and tools
2. Developing and implementing metrics, infrastructure, and business processes
3. Establishing and communicating best practices
4. Managing the overall marketing budget and budgeting process and
5. Identifying and deploying technology to support performance measurement and reporting

where in my current role, I'm only specialised on No. 4 function. So the job basically involving budget allocations to countries, budget performance reporting and subject matter experts on finance and accounting processes. Every quarter, I will sick to my stomach to ensure the team did not over/underspend.. huhuhu.. I'm not sure how long I will enjoy working in this role, the department or the company..just wait n see la.. where my fate will bring me after this..huhuhu.. aper2pun I'm not in the state of searching anymore which I guess is a good thing.. :)

I don't have that much experiences as a pekerja yet. But every journey I took in each job provides a whole new experience and learnings. I'm having a great journey as pekerja so far. Hopefully it will continue to be better and better..Hope I will continue to be a good pekerja and have my share of contributions to the nations.

p/s: No more Pt 4 folks.. hahahah.. Maybe coming soon.."Saya Sebagai Seorang Surirumah" plak...hehehe..tapi biler ek boleh di publish? hmmm..

Saya Sebagai Seorang Pekerja Pt2 - From tele-marketing to 'Floor Engineer' (kata asrul..hehehe) to data entry to housekeeping..I had it all..

2009-05-03T00:55:00.000-07:00

After my degree, I decided to further my studies. At Glasgow this time..Scotland so-called shopping heaven..Studying in Glasgow was a total different experience for me than before because I went there as a 'FAMA' student. (self-funded, father and mother scholar..hehehe). And, when we (my bro and I) planned to go, what was sufficient financially was only our tuition fees and I was expected to find my own source of income for accomodation and foods. Things had not going as planned for my brother because, he struggled to get used of the living and studying environment there. I was also struggled to find time for part time work due to tight schedule of my studies. The classes were 9am-5pm everyday, plus extra hours after that for group assignment discussions (sometimes until late nite), which can dragged to my weekends since that's the only available time for all of us to discuss and do assignments. sigh...

It was only on my 3rd semester, when I finally get a chance to earn some income. Through JobCentre, I went for a job-trial as a market researcher for a market research company. It was 6pm-10pm shift job, pays GBP6.50/hour. As long as it did not overlapped with my class timetable, I was OK with it. Since the position title was market researcher, I had the feeling that the job more or less would be about calling people and answer questionnaires or something. I guess, my early prediction was wrong. I didn't really know back then that for a profit-getter organisation, anything associate with marketing should lead to generating revenue, although if it's just a market research. So it's not a 'you-ask-questions-and-the-other-person-(potential customer(s)-answer' kind of market research task. In some point, you will need to use your charm and influencing skills to the person you call to be interested to buy/use the product or services you're researching about and make them agree for the sales person (the tele-sales people) to call them later. I was struggled at first because, I am not much of a talker but the script did helped a lot..ha ha.. Since, I was working for evening shift and it obviously dinner time, it's quite hard really to get people attention. I got a lot of yelling, cursing and angry attack because of that. The database can sometimes turn you down, where the person had made it clear they are not interested but the other staff did not mark them appropriately, the name would pop up again on your screen on random ( even worst, if at the same day itself), and the results..you'll get the yelling. The job will pretty much depends on your performance as well (you can get extra bonus of being top performer). There's obviously certain target that you need to achieve. Thing s are OK when you're new coz your target can be pretty reachable. But as time goes by, you definitely need to gear up your game and that's where the pressure came in. I don't think I had much passion on the services they're marketing and I don't really give a damn on persuading the people as well. Plus, I have so much pressure in my studies already, I don't think, I need to add more stress to my life (need to reach the target, getting people being rude to you on a day-to-day basis, etc). So, I call it quit..huhuhu..

I later, found a job early in the morning, which suit my class timetable. It was a cleaning duties in a store called TK Max. I worked 7am-9am every morning then straight-away went to class after that. I can cuci mata while cuci the floor and pick my favourite stuffs..hehehehe... The job was very easy, sweeping and moping the floor and wiping mirrors. The pays? hmm.. I think it was GBP5/hour and it was just enough for my ASDA/TESCO (groceries) expenses and shopping cravings..hehehe.. From 1 cleaning to job to another, I was recommended by fellow Malaysian students to work at UGC Cinema plak, 4hrs per shift (6am to 10am), pays GBP 5.5/hour. Since it offers longer hours, I chose to work in the weekends at first, until I finished my semester. During my dissertation writings, I extended my working days to 5 days a week although sometimes, I do volunteer to do more to cover MC staffs. Had such a blast working here, not because I enjoyed collecting pop corns, drink waste, snacks and condoms so much..but the job was like a 'treasure hunt' quest. If you're lucky, you can get all kind of 'treasures' that people left behind inside the cinema hall the day before. Umbrella, GBP1 syillings, gloves and the best treasure of all.. Handphone!!! I'm not really proud of my doings and behaviour here. hehehe..But as Abg Zaki told me, "Buat aper nak rasa bersalah. Saper soh depa tinggalkan? Kalau imah tak amik, org lain yg amik".. hahaha..Setelah mendapat sokongan moral dari orang ramai..imah kuatkan semangat utk terus mengambil aper jer benda yg imah jumpa..hehehehe..In addition to being treasure hunter at the cinema, once in a while, when the supervisor got a cleaning tender somewhere else, she would recommend me to come a long. Yeay!! Extra hours!! Extra $$$!! By this time, people already gather, that my savings are mountaining..hahaha..working everyday and on weekends as well..huhuhu.. One of her usual tender was a cleaning duties at a horse-race stadium. It was my first time went to a horse-race track and some of us did put a bet on those horses. ha ha ha. While collecting glasses and rubbish, I did get a chance to have a peek on the races and good looking socialites at the VIPs podium.. hehehehe..It was good fun..I'm loving my life as 'Floor Engineer'.. and Hygiene Specialist..hehehehe..

After finished with my dissertation, I decided to find a fulltime job instead. So my friend/classmate, Fey and I went to a recruitment agency and the first assignment I got was a temp job as Data Entry Clerk, my first office job.. hahahah.. Got better pays of course, and for once, at least no brooms or mop or cleaning detergent involved. hehehehe.. Since I know, temping job will not be forever, I searched around for permanent employment. Through, newspaper ads, I came across a lot of Business Development position in various marketing firms. The ads looks interesting - Welcome to freash-grade, thus no experience needed since training will be provided and opportunity to run your own marketing firm in 1-2 years. So, I chose 1, and booked for an appointment for an interview. The office looks great and professional. The people looks confident and well-dress as well. Everything that you would expect a marketing professional would be. After being briefed about the company, the job ladder and stuffs, I was introduced to my so called mentor of the day. He was not bad looking..hmmm.. yummy yummy.. He's doing marketing for a low-cost phone line providers and the type of marketing he's doing? Face-to-Face, Door-to-Door , House-to-House marketing. So I follow him around for a day and observe the tasks. I've always been very skeptical about this kind of job and as if reading my minds, he kept telling me to keep an open mind throughout the day. Honestly, I agree for some type of services and products and promotions, direct contact marketing like that is the most effective way. But the job was totally not for me. And thinking of security issue, wondering around alone in the city that you know very little about and go house-to-house and inviting yourself inside strangers' home. It's just not suitable for me I guess. No running marketing firm in a year for me then.. hehehe.. Since that, I ignore all similar job adverts.

After a while the searching brings me to one of my former employer again, Marriot Hotel. I was maid in Scotland again.. huhuhu.. at that time this was the only fast track employment I can easily get hold of before I can find proper job. It's just so easy..I went to their open interview and the next day you can practically start working. And it puts at least GBP700ish inside my account. Kire OKla..Just enough for everything (if you live in such moderations, of course). Obviously, I need some $$$ to continue my living. Gas and electricity bills obviously did not came cheap- (At this point, I really missing campus life (living in Yarrow), where all these utilities were covered and I don't have to worry and sleeping in coldness to save). Kalau nak tunggu permanent employment somewhere else, mati kelaparanlah saya..huhuhu..Since I already had my experiences being a housekeeper before, things were fine. I had my own floor/division and was very semangat to ensure the rooms under my care were spotless.. So semangat nak jadi housekeeping cemerlang..hahaha.. and most importantly, I like it that I can watch TV while working.. hehehe.. (sempat tgk live EPL matches lagi kekadang..hehehe)..The most challenging part through this employment was during fasting month. Lucky it was winter time. So, the break fasting time was quite early..around 4pm-ish, although, I only managed to eat hotel biscuits only..huhuhu.. Because the job was based on shift-rotation, you won't have a fix weekends day offs. Not just that, because of the unpredictable rotation, I can end up working 9 straight days (can be even more if my next break schedule on the weekends) before getting the 2 days break. I hate weekends off because it will be useless anyway. The supervisor will desperately calls you up early in the morning asking u to turn up to work to cover absent staffs. (Obviously hangover cases la..grrrr..dah tau kerja next day, lagi nak gatal2 minum sampai mabuk..).

I'm not sure at one point, how long I should work that hard before getting the job I really want and suit the qualification. It was uncertain to me at that time, of when, I would get my 'office' job. Not a data entry job. Not tele-sales or tele-marketing job. But a real job. A professional position. Life was fun there. And I am comfortable there. But I guess, the pepatah saying, "hujan emas di negeri orang, hujan batu di negeri sendiri, lebih baik di negeri sendiri" is true. After my graduation day, I bin my plan to stay and work in the UK and decided to just go back home (Malaysia) and being close to family, where I should belong. I guessed, things can be much easier for me back home and I might be very much in demand..I think so..

How's my life as a 'pekerja' in Malaysia, then? To be continued...hehehehe..

Saya Sebagai Seorang Pekerja Pt1 - Maid in Scotland

2009-04-29T21:56:00.001-07:00

Sempena menyambut Hari Pekerja esok, tiba-tiba imah terfikir pasal perjalanan hidup imah sebagai seorang pekerja. Imah mula-mula menjinakkan diri dalam dunia pekerjaan sewaktu belajar di Edinburgh dulu. Really can't remember when and what was my first job. Hmmm.. rasanya a temping job at a rugby game at Murrayfield Stadium, jadi waiter or lebih tepat, penghidang/ penyedok makanan to the staffs and crews. Other than that, rasanya ader buat beberapa temping jobs lagi, tapi dah tak berapa nak ingat..huhuhu..Sebab getting sick with temp agency, where you need to call them every bloody second to ask them what available jobs are available for grab, I tried to find a secure part time job. Preferably, working in store la, jadi sales girl ker, cashier ker, but susah jugaklah nak dapat diterima..tak berkelayakan katanya..

I don't remember how at last, I got the job at Dalmahoy Marriot Hotel and Country Club, as a Housekeeping Associates. ha ha ha.. Nama jawatan jer cam gempak, k. Since imah memang terkenal sebagai penyepah kat rumah, imah bekerja sebagai housekeeper and buat kerja2 mengemas adalah sesuatu yang sebenarnya kelakar buat mak imah waktu tuh.. Tak kisah ler.. saper yang nak free free kasik GBP4.50/hour? Mungkin, tanpa sedar, imah telah diturunkan secara turun temurun dari mak untuk pandai buat kerja2 mengemas nih, jadi, kira imah boleh pukul jugakla buat kerja2 housekeeping nih...huhuhu..(nampaknyer, berdasarkan working experience nih, mak kena upah lebih kurang RM25/hour utk imah buat kerja2 housekeeping nih kat umah sendiri.. hehehe). Imah kerja on weekends jer time tuh and in several public/bank holidays, kalau diorang perlu extra staffs. I do remember this job a lot because, I remember that it was tough. I was required to super clean 15 rooms (bukan setakat asal nampak bersih and kemas jer, kena free from habuk, rambut and debu2 and cermin kena super licin dan bersinar2) and memang nightmare kalau sumer adalah check-out rooms. Faham2 jela tahap sampah yang harus dikerjakan.. huhuhu.. Memang penat sangat-sangat buat kerja nih (especially part kena bagun awal),tak termasuk jari jemari yang luka dan cedera kena bahan pencuci and angkat mengangkat tilam. Tapi biler dah lama and sedikit berpengalaman, pandaila jugak menipu sikit-sikit untuk mempercepatkan kerja dan mengurangkan tenaga..hahahah.. Kalau nak ikut panduan kerja 100%, alamat memang takleh la nak siap kerja on time.. Jadi, apa2 benda pun dalam bilik hotel especially gelas, janganlah korang pandai2 terus guna tanpa basuh dulu. Entah aper2 kain diorg guna wat lap.. huhuhuhu..

My lucky break finally arrived, when 1 day, my supervisor told me to come at 2pm on the next day. Moving forward, I'll work on night-shift and it should be interesting, katanya Yeay!!! I told myself. At least I don't have to wake up early in the morning.. hehehe.. The next day, I was briefed on what would I be doing.. still need to clean rooms, but now reduced to 5 rooms only!!! yeeha.. Rasa nak melompat terkinja2 cam monyet time tuh jugak.. (Tapi kekadang kena buat lebih la.. cover mereka2 yg masih ketinggalan waktu shift pagi tuh.. huhuhu).. Then, come 6pm, I need to do a 'turn-down' service for the Executive Suites and VIP guests.. Bukanlah buat service aper2 pun..Cuma kena gi tutup2 langsir, bukak kan lampu, sediakan katil untuk diorg terus ready untuk tido, letak coklat and letak fresh towels.. senang sangat2.. Lebih menyeronokkan, hari pertama Imah kerna nighjt shift, supervisor kasik tau yang Robbie William was staying at the hotel and we'll go to do housekeeping at his room... Robbie William???!! tarik nafas sekejap.. Imah takdela minat sangat kat dia, tapi nak dapat masuk bilik artis nih!! Macam2 perasaan timbul time tuh, excited, nervous, bangga pun ader..tak kirala, walaupun untuk cuci jamban dier jer.. heheheh..

I was brought to a different side of the hotel, where I've never been before. Rupa-rupanya diorang ader lagi advance punyer suites. 1 room leh kira cam 1 apartmentla, ader ruang katil, TV area, beberapa bilik air. Katil pun kirea super size la. Tak sama cam bilik2 yg slalu imah dok cuci selama nih. And these rooms got padang golf nyer view with classic-english design. The buiding itself macam a tower castle, with long windows and flowery curtains with scallops. Rasa cam katak bawah tempurung jer time tuh. Tak tau selok belok tempat kerja sendiri.. huhuhu..

How's my experience cuci bilik Robbie William? Biasa jer.. Ketuk pintu bilik cam biasa..Knock Knock Knock.."Housekeeping!!!", I shout (cuma kali nih.. buat yg lebih seksi daripada biasala kan..ceh.. hahahah). A guy openned the door for us and welcomed us in. We went in, and straight away imah dah boleh nampak Robbie William kat dalam, (I'm just facing his back, sebab dier dok mengadap TV, nampak cam tengah baca something on piece of papers). So as a professional, (professional la kononnyer nih) imah cuma dok fokus dengan kerja2 housekeeping yang perlu dilakukan jer. Cuma sekali sekala jela dok jeling2 sikit ke arah Robbie William tuh..takdela bercakap2 or hello2 each other or mintak autograph ker..hehehehe..Mungkin sebab ader supervisor teman sekali. Kenala behave sikit..Dalam hati cam, ishh, kacau daun jer pak cik nih..

Memang best la dapat buat night shift nih.. Tak memenatkan. Habis kerja kul 8 malam.. Takdela lewat sangat pun. Cuma boring je la, sorang2 kat ofis, jaga telepon, kot kot orang ader request anything. Cuma ader 1 insiden jela yang imah tak dapat nak lupa. Tiba-tiba, ader kes org mabuk buat kecoh pulak. Ishhh.. belum pukul 8 dah mabuk. Kebetulan time tuh supervisor belum balik lagi, so kami pergila tengok.. aper benda kes nyer. Sekali masuk bilik.. then tengok bilik air.. mak aih.. muntah bersepah-sepah kat lantai, dinding sumer. Imah rasa cam nak menyumbang lagi muntah kat situ.. Kire cam blurr jugakla, memikirkan camner nak kena bersihkan muntah2 tuh.. Last last, to my rescue supervisor tuh yg volunteer tolong bersihkan.. phewww.. Nasib baik dapat supervisor yang baik hati..

Alhamdulillah, imah tak pernahla menghadapi kesukaran or masalah waktu buat kerja nih. Kira kes kena kacau ngan customers pun kire tak dela.. Sekejap jer pun rasanyer. Tapi, imah selalu wonder, macam mana pekerja2 lain tuh boleh survive buat kerja housekeeping nih for so many years. (sebab waktu imah kerja tuh, majoriti pekerja adalah golongan mak cik2 yg mungkin jugak sudah mencapai tahap nenek, yang dah bekerja kat situ for 20+ years..huhuhuhu). Imah kerja ntah berapa bulan, part time jer plak tuh, terasa sangat penat lelah nyer.

p/s: Imah masih simpan uniform and name tag waktu pakai masa kerja kat sini dulu.. sentimental value.. hehehehe

Smarter Planet Series: A smarter grid will power progress

2009-04-27T02:23:00.000-07:00

"The creation and distribution of electric power globally are not maximised to their fullest potential...with little or no intelligence to balance loads or monitor power flows, enough electricity around the world is lost annually that could power India, Germany and Canada for an entire year...the power grids in Malaysia, like those in the rest of the world, are the largest remaining artefact of the industrial age and they are due for an upgrade"
- Ou Shian Waei, CGM, IBM Malaysia

[Learn how we make power grids smarter in The Edge]

Courtesy of Comms, IBM Malaysia

What Does your Dream Mean?

2009-04-22T18:53:00.000-07:00

Recurring Dream
Most dreams contain messages that serve to teach us something about ourselves. Unfortunately many a times we forget what we dream about as we go about our daily routine. With recurring dreams, the message may be so important and/or powerful that it just will not go away. The frequent repetition of such dreams forces you to pay attention and confront the dream. The dream is trying desperately to tell you something. Such dreams are often nightmarish or frightening in their content, which also helps you to take notice and pay attention to them.

Recurring dreams are quite common and are often triggered by a certain life situation or a problem that keeps coming back again and again. These dreams may recur daily, once a week, or once a month, but whatever the frequency, there is little variation in the dream content itself. It usually points to a personal weakness, fear, or your inability to cope with something in your life - past or present. The repetitive patterns in your dream can reveal some of the most valuable information on yourself. It may point to a conflict, situation or matter in your waking life that remains unresolved or unsettled. Or some urgent underlying message in your unconscious is demanding to be understood.

Lucid Dream - a dream state in which one is conscious enough to recognize that one is in the dream state and which stays in one's memory

Lucid dreams occurs when you realize you are dreaming in the middle of your dream. "Wait a second. This is only a dream!" Most dreamers wake themselves up once they realize that they are only dreaming. Other dreamers have cultivated the skill to remain in the lucid state of dreaming. They become an active participant in their dream, make decisions in their dreams and influence the dream's outcome without awakening
Lucidity can open endless doors to self-knowledge, exploration, and fulfillment, but it is not purely in the domain of "new-age science". Lucid dreaming is a scientifically accepted phenomenon which has been proven to exist countless times in sleep laboratories, and whose potentials are only beginning to be explored.

Dream About Being Chased
Dreams about being chased often stem from feelings of anxiety in your waking life. The way we as humans respond to anxiety and pressure in real life is typically manifested as a chase dream. Running is an instinctive response to physical threats in our environment. Often in dream scenarios, you are being pursued by an attacker (can be human, could be an animal) that wants to hurt, or possibly kill you. Dreams about being chased may represent your way of coping with fears, stress or various situations in your waking life. Instead of confronting your problems, you are running away from them and avoiding them.

The pursuer or attacker who is chasing you in your dream may also represent a part of yourself. Your own feelings of anger, jealousy, fear, and possibly love, can assume the appearance of threatening figure. You may be projecting these feelings onto the unknown chaser. Next time you have a chase dream, turn around and confront your pursuer. Ask them why they are chasing you.

A more direct analysis of chase dreams is the fear of being attacked. Such dreams are more common among women than men, who may feel physically vulnerable in the urban environment. These dreams are inspired by fears of violence and sexual assault in which we are so over-exposed from the media. The violence that the media portrays magnifies our fears and how at risk we all are.

Dream About Flying
More than a third of the dreaming population reports having had at least one dream about flying. And, if you have one, you're very likely to have more. Your chance of having a flying dream doubles if you are a lucid dreamer (you are able to become awake and aware as you dream).

Flying dreams fall under a category of dreams where you become aware that you are dreaming, known as lucid dreaming. Many dreamers have described the ability to fly in their dreams as an exhilarating, joyful, and liberating experience. There are 3 feelings commonly associated with dreams about flying:
1.) Flying with easy and enjoying the scenery and landscape below. This usually suggests that you are on top of a particular situation and you have risen above something.
2.) You are having difficulty staying in flight, and obstacles are in your way (i.e. power lines, trees, mountains). These barriers can represent a particular obstacle that is standing in your way in your waking life.
3.) You are afraid whilst you are flying, and you may feel that you are flying too high. If this happens when you are flying, chances are you are afraid of challenges and of success.In all respects, dreams about flying are extremely vivid, and again are considered a lucid dream. For lucid dreams to take place, your body must be in a state of R.E.M which is a deep sleep. There are sleep aids available to you that can help your body get into this state, and also just give you a great sleep.

Falling Dream
Dreams in which you are falling are quite common in the dream world. Contrary to popular belief, you will not die if you do not wake up before you hit the ground during your fall.
Like most dream themes, falling dreams are an indication of insecurities, anxieties and instabilities in your own life. Overwhelming feelings and out of control situations in your waking life can cause these dreams and this may reflect the way you feel in a certain relationship or your work environment.

According to the Freudian theory, falling dreams indicate that you are contemplating giving into a sexual urge or impulse, and you may be lacking indiscretion.

Falling dreams can also often reflect a sense of failure or inferiority in some circumstance or situation. It may be the fear of failing in your job/school, loss of status, or failure in love. You feel shameful and lack a sense of pride. You are unable to keep up with the status quo or that you don't measure up.

Naked Dream
Dreaming that you are completely or partially naked is very common. Nudity symbolizes a variety of things depending on your real life situation.

This is probably the most common of all dreams, as everyone can recall having these dreams. Naked Dreams usually represent two things. The first is that the dreamer wants freedom and nothing else. The second symbolizes the fear of being exposed or vulnerable, and it is very natural to feel ashamed.

Many times, when you realize that you are naked in your dream, no one else seems to notice. Everyone else in the dream is going about their business without giving a second look at your nakedness. This implies that your fears are unfounded; no one will notice except you. You may be magnifying the situation and making an issue of nothing. On the other hand, such dreams may mean your desire (or failure) to get noticed.

Dream about Tooth Falling out
Dreams about losing our teeth symbolize the loss of childhood innocence. These dreams often occur at times of transition from one life stage to the next and can be a message that an important milestone is occurring and urging you to face the inevitable. Your dream may be a message that an important milestone is occurring and urging you to face the inevitable.

We need our teeth to feed our bodies. Eating is necessary to maintain the body's growth, energy and health. In this context, losing teeth may be associated with insecurity about your livelihood. Perhaps you are stuck in a "dead-end" job and fear for your future. Perhaps you are growing older and are becoming anxious about how much time you have left to work and make an income. You may be getting "long in the tooth" and fear losing your sexual attractiveness. Dreaming of false teeth symbolizes concern about your self-image. We all must deal with the process of growing older. Find fun ways to re-invent yourself incorporating all the wisdom and experience that you have gained.

Since many of the dreams that are associated with your teeth falling out can be unpleasant, anxiety can hit you when you are trying to sleep. The result can be a restless night of a lot of tossing and turning, or in more serous cases, insomnia.

Dream about Death
Dreams about death can be one of many things. Right off the bat, most people think that a dream about death is a bad thing, but this is not necessarily true.

This dream is very common and often means that something is ending in one's life such as a long family battle or a battle with a sickness. Things that have been dragging along in your life such as the coming to an end of a career could finally be ending with a dream about death. Other things it could possibly be would be an ending to a relationship. In most cases the relationship or career is making the person unhappy or not a good situation, so the dream is a good thing.Generally these dreams are a start to something new and fresh. The symbolism of death is most always a positive thing. There are a few cases when it really means that death is going to happen, but usually it means the rebirth of something better. It could also mean that it could be the end of a person’s worries. The worries will die in a sense. The cause of the worry will cease to exist. Another possible meaning could be of prosperity and longevity.

p/s: Always got the dream about being chased..huhuhu..
Source: MeaningofDreams.Net, http://www.meaning-of-dreams.net

Smarter Planet Series: Making 'smart traffic' the norm

2009-04-15T21:38:00.000-07:00

"Traffic congestion is synonymous with Malaysia, especially in the Klang Valley, and traffic jams, if not managed correctly, can hurt the socio-economy of our country..."Smart traffic" is not yet the norm, but it is not some far-off vision of tomorrow. In many places, IBM is helping to make it happen today."

- Ou Shian Waei, CGM, IBM Malaysia

[Read about how we make traffic Smarter in The Edge]

Courtesy of Comms, IBM Malaysia

There can be Miracle..When you Believe..

2009-04-14T08:40:00.000-07:00

Can Liverpool create a miracle today? It's not impossible to win game(s) at Stamford Bridge. However, going against the home team that has a proven record defensively, it would be a very very very huge challenge not just to win, but also to win by 3 clear goals!!! uwargh!!! Why they (Liverpool) conceded that much of goals in the first place last week were neither forgiven nor forgotten by the fans..

Thus, it is right for people to think that only miracle will help Liverpool making a comeback in the coming 2nd-leg. Obviously, they (Liverpool) will need all kind of luck and favours in the world to have a slight chance.

Typical Liverpool's luck?
1. Penalties..at least 1 must come from Gerrard diving antics or/and questionable hand ball..
2. Chelsea player being red-carded (the Lampard..the better)..maybe unfairly..
3. Defenders making mistakes, giving away ball to Torres near penalty box area
4. Last minute injuries to Chelsea's key players
5. Chelsea giving own goal

To all of the Liverpool's fans out there, let's enjoy the song below and start believing!!!

Smarter Planet Series: Managing Water Resources Better

2009-04-12T23:57:00.000-07:00

"Access to clean water is a basic need and is essential for enhancing the quality of life and economic growth in any country...in Malaysia, per capita availibility of water will greatly decrease as a result of a growing population - with advances in technology we can be smarter about how we manage our planet's water"

- Ou Shian Waei, CGM, IBM Malaysia
.

[Read about how IBM make water management Smarter in The Edge]

Courtesy of Comms, IBM Malaysia

I'm sorry, people..I can't make everyone happy..

2009-04-12T03:30:00.000-07:00

In life, sometimes you tend to think about others before yourself. You will do everything that you can to help others especially the ones that you really care about. The intention is simple. You want to make that other person(s) happy. If she/he/they happy, you'll feel happy too. It seems like a win-win situation for both party then..

All my life, I've always been that person. It is my nature to be nice to everyone, to help whoever that in needs of my service(s), make a decision that will benefit everyone (not just myself) and care about other people's feelings above myself. I managed to be this person when I was growing up. It's just so easy to please everbody back then, I guess.. hehehe..However as life goes on, when your life has a broader perspectives than just passing your exams or/and finished your educations and just being surrounded with your family and friends, it becomes harder to please everybody. It's hard to make a decision that will benefit you at the same time benefit others as well. It's hard to help this 1 person and at the same time, help thousand of others. At one point, you will not have the self capabilities and resources to do everything to everyone.

It's hard when I know that I had dissappointed somebody of my doings. I feel sad if I can't help this person(s) although technically, I should. I feel bad when I know that I'd moved on at other people's loss. I can't bear to know that I made people mad at me, hate me and/or think I'm selfish. However, what I can only say is that.. "I'm sorry, people..I can't make everyone happy"

Faces of The Cabinet of Malaysia

2009-04-09T20:21:00.000-07:00

These are the faces of new ministers of The Cabinet of Malaysia (not kitchen cabinet, k...). The Cabinet of Malaysia is the executive branch of Malaysia's government, led by the Prime Minister, a council of ministers who are accountable to the Parliament [1]. These are the faces who will collectively decides the government's policy and tactical direction and administer executive branch government agencies or ministry. Congratulations to all of them in their new appointment. Together, hope they will succeedly bring Malaysia as a country that is Cemerlang, Gemilang dan Terbilang!!! :D

Smarter Planet Series: The Next Leadership Agenda

2009-04-08T19:55:00.000-07:00

"The first decade of the new century has awakened us to peril and promise of global integration...I believe that this moment calls for winning by not surviving the storm but by changing the game."

- Ou Shian Waei, CGM, IBM Malaysia

[ Read the first of an exclusive Smarter Planet Series on The Edge]

Courtesy of Comms, IBM Malaysia

Battle of the Saturday Night: EPL vs AF7...

2009-03-15T01:37:00.000-07:00

Conflict of interest on our usual Saturday night.. Entertainment vs Sports channel. At the Sports Channel side, there is Ajim (my bro)!!!! And I also got, at the Entertainment Channel side, my mom!!!! Where do I stand in this battle? If it is the real boxing match, I will be the guy in in the black and white stripe shirt.. hahahah.. or the sexy girl parading the 'number' cardbox.. ;) I'm neutral in this battle, because I do want to watch both.. although a bit heavy to the Sports Channel..Liverpool lawan Man U nih.. bukan sebarang match..

EPL (Liverpool vs Man U) vs AF7 (First concert)? The winner is...drum rolling AF7!! (imah 2kar channel 812 gakla waktu iklan..nasib baik MU kalah, jadi Ajim tak kisah sangatla sebab tak tgk match tuh 100%ly)

Recap on the KOP's heroes of the night... and my personal choice of AF7 best performance last night..

Liverpool is the Europe Master Again!!!

2009-03-11T05:43:00.000-07:00

The hot topic for today is no other than Liverpool's 4-0 demolition of Real Madrid this early morning. Obviously, the KOP's fans are all over the moon (in real world..jumping up and down in front of the TV with excitement) with this results.

I didn't watch the 1st leg coz I overslept (typical me..huhuhu). However, it did not excite me to watch the 2nd leg game at all. Maybe I was still sulking over their EPL title meltdown. It's like I was in the "I don't care" /"whatever" mode. huhuhu..After a few SMSs buzzing thru, disturbing my peace of mind and nice dream, I finally forced myself to woke up and to my astonishment..I saw.."3-0!!!"..What the...!!! I missed the best part of all la.. Watching thru the remaining 30 mins, Real Madrid did try to get back into the game although Liverpool looked more threatening at the counter attack. Feeling confident with the results (berlagak kejap), I flip thru to next channel to watch Chelsea's game instead in hope they are actually losing..hahahah..

I'm loving Liverpool again!!!! hahahah.. It's always an on-off relationship between me and Liverpool. I already broke up with them a few weeks back..but now we're getting back together..hahahah..

PPSMI: Hanya Tinggal Kenangan?

2009-03-09T05:22:00.000-07:00

As copy and paste from Ministry of Education Malaysia's Official Portal.. Katanya.. Walaupun..

" PPSMI is the outcome of a policy decision made by the Government of Malaysia as the result from the Minister’s Council Meeting held on 19 July 2002.

The implementation of PPSMI was carried out in stages beginning with the 2003 schooling session. The pioneers were all Year 1 students for Primary Schools, Form 1 and Lower 6 students for Secondary Schools.The full implementation of PPSMI was in 2007 for Secondary Schools and 2008 for Primary Schools.

The rationale for the decision to change the medium of instruction from the Malay Language to English for the teaching and learning of Science and Mathematics subjects was made based on the government’s concern on the nation’s human capital development towards achieving the standard of a developed country, as well as an early preparation to compete in the era of globalization.

It is widely known that the field of science and mathematics form the basis and have a crucial role in the progress and development of a country. Various innovations and discoveries in these two fields happen rapidly and information access is mostly in the English language.

English language is also the language spoken internationally and mastery in this language would allow easy access to information in these fields.

In conclusion, the policy decision to implement PPSMI was made to ensure students’ mastery in science and mathematics in view of the fact that most of the sources are available in the English language. Indirectly, it is also hoped that the implementation of PPSMI would contribute to the enhancing of students’ command of the language."

p/s: So, what is all about that Maths and Science subjects will be taught in Malay language again?!! The full implmentation had just happenned and now, we're dis-implementing it? hmmm..

Tanpa Kekasihku....

2009-03-02T08:26:00.000-08:00

Di mana letak syurga itu? Biar kugantikan tempatmu denganku..
Adakah tanda syurga itu? Biar kutemukan untuk bersamamu..

2009-02-19T08:59:00.000-08:00

This is really disturbing.. Apart from a group of male species who I can categorize as 'buaya darat' (womanizer), I really despise guys who are violent to women, especially to the women they love. I don’t mind having a guy who is strong and definitely know how to kick butt when they require to. But using your physical strength advantage over a woman with the effect of injuring the poor little woman is just so over the top.

p/s: I hope I won't come accross with laki kaki pukul and panas baran..

American Idol is Back!!!!

2009-02-18T09:16:00.000-08:00

Yeay!!! AI is back with the new Season 8, with a slight change in format for the Top12 cut and is with a 4th judge. Before I get started with the new season addictions, I'm just refreshing my memory on these 2 great performances by David Cook last year. He definitely had me at Hello...

David Cook - Hello .................David Cook - Billie Jean

Puisi Untuk Hati...

2009-02-15T07:13:00.000-08:00

I'm dedicating this first blog entry to the first ever poem I ever wrote...

Hati ada satu
Hanya untuk yang satu

Yang satu ada yang lain
Bagaimana hati dapat terima yang lain?

Mengapa perlu ada hati
Pada yang satu yang ada yang lain?

Jangan kecewa hati
Hilang yang satu ada yang lain..

p/s: This is an attempt to restore my creative writing skills again and my 'jiwang'ness..I really hope to bring that heart again back to life..